


The Very Best Things About Alfred

by SkylarEQuinn



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-23
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2020-12-28 18:23:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 30,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21141167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkylarEQuinn/pseuds/SkylarEQuinn
Summary: Human AU. When Arthur Kirkland prepares to leave for college abroad, he stumbles across a notebook that he had created with an old friend whom he had lost touch with. After making a phone call, Arthur finds himself going on a nationwide adventure to find the friend that he couldn't bring himself to forget.





	1. Prologue

Arthur Kirkland rummaged through the boxes in his bedroom, wondering what to keep and what to throw away. He needed to downsize before going to college in the autumn. Though he wasn't one to develop sentimental attachment to anything, some of the things he came across were hard to get rid of. A few of those things would include a stuffed green rabbit with wings that his grandmother had made him when he was little, some yearbooks from elementary school, and a book of pressed flowers that he and his childhood friend Alfred Jones had made before Arthur had moved away in sixth grade.

He sighed as he combed his blond hair back out of his green eyes with his slim fingers. "Who knew I had so much junk?" he asked himself. With another sigh, he got around to opening the final box, ending up throwing most of it in the garbage.

One thing stuck out to him, though. It was a small notebook with pictures and clippings sticking out of it. Though Arthur could only see the back of it, he already knew what it was. It was a small book he had made about Alfred when they found out he was moving away. Alfred had made one about Arthur as well, and the boys each decided to hold on to their own to make the separation between them less difficult.

Arthur pulled the notebook out of the box and smiled when he saw the cover. "The Very Best Things About Alfred" was written on the front in large, clumsy letters. And though he knew he didn't have the time for it, Arthur cracked open the notebook to a page and read what it said.

"Alfred Foster Jones is my best friend, and here is why. He had always been by my side. We are straight-up homies. No one will ever replace him."

He felt his lips pull from a smile to a frown, knowing that he had lost contact with Alfred after a falling out freshman year of high school. Finding this book made him wonder how his old friend was doing. Should he give him a call? No, that would be weird. Or would it?

Deciding against it, Arthur took the notebook downstairs to where his mom was making dinner. "Mum, check out what I found," he said, sitting on a barstool at the island counter where she was working. He slid the notebook across the counter to her. "It really takes you back, doesn't it?"

Alice Kirkland looked up from her cooking and adjusted her glasses as she peered down at the notebook. "Now there's a name I haven't seen in ages," she mused, smiling. "I miss our friend Alfie Jones." She wiped her hands on a dishcloth and began flipping through the pages of the notebook. "He was such a sweet boy when we lived next door to each other." Her green eyes shifted up to her son. "What ever happened to him anyway? You haven't even spoken his name in a couple years."

"We got into a fight freshman year and haven't spoken to each other since," Arthur flatly stated, taking the notebook back and shutting it. His fingertip traced the words on the cover as he thought for a few moments. "I do wonder how he's doing sometimes," he admitted. "Do you think I should give him a call?"

"I don't see why not," Alice answered. "Then again, you know most families don't use home phones anymore."

"That's true," he sighed, pulling out his cell phone. "But I'll still try it out."

He went back up to his room and set the notebook on his desk as he collapsed into the chair and found Alfred's old number in his contacts. His fingers tapped impatiently on the hard wood of his desk as he waited for someone to pick up.

"Hello?" a woman's voice answered. "Jones Residence, Amelia speaking."

"Mrs. Jones?" Arthur asked, dumbfounded over the fact that they still had a home phone. "This is Arthur Kirkland. I was a friend of Alfred's."

"Yes," she said, a strange tone to her voice. "I remember you quite clearly, Arthur. Unfortunately, Alfred no longer lives here and no longer has a cell phone. I'm sorry."

"Is there any way to reach him?" Arthur asked, leaning forward in his seat. Something didn't seem right. How was there no way to contact Alfred? "I will be studying abroad for college in a month, and I would like to see him if possible."

"Next month, you say?" she asked. "It may take awhile to do so, but I believe that if you talked to some friends of his, they could point you in his direction." Amelia sighed on the other end of the receiver. "Unfortunately, they're all over the place."

The boy's interest was piqued. "You mean for me to go on a roadtrip to find him?" he asked. He had always loved adventures. In fact, he and Alfred used to go on adventures all over the place as children.

"Yes," she sighed. "It's the only way." After a moment, she said, "I only know where to find one person, though. But she may be able to lead you to him, or at least other people who would know."

"Would it be alright for me to go talk to her?"

"I can let her know ahead of time," she stated, a smile in her voice. "Let me find her address real quick."

.

Amelia Jones hung up the home phone and took a deep, shaky breath. She didn't expect the day when Arthur would call their home again. With trembling fingers, she dialed the number and waited for the person on the other end to pick up. "Hello," she greeted. "This is Amelia Jones, Alfred's mother. I finally received the call. He's coming your way in two days."

After hanging up the phone, she smiled fondly at the picture of her son that she kept on the mantle of her fireplace. "He's on his way, Alfie."

.

Arthur looked at the address that he had scribbled down on a loose piece of notebook paper. This person lived about a four hour drive away from him. Though he didn't understand why he couldn't just call the person, he could sense an adventure on the horizon.

Little did Arthur know that he was about to experience the craziest month of his life.


	2. Chapter 2

Arthur laid on his bed as he flipped through The Very Best Things About Alfred. He would be departing in the morning to meet a girl named Natalia Arlovskaya. Her name sounded vaguely familiar to him, almost as if Alfred had mentioned her before. She couldn't have been all too important, though, considering that Arthur couldn't remember her. It made him wonder how important she was to Alfred, considering that she had a better idea of where he was than his own mother did. Was she his girlfriend?

He set the book aside and stared up at his ceiling. Was he really going to spend the entirety of his last month in America trying to track down someone who might not even want to see him once found? Was he truly prepared for something so utterly insane? What would Alfred think after not seeing or talking to him for years? Would Alfred refuse to see him in the end? There was only one way to find out. After all, the worst thing that would happen would be getting sent away by Alfred. At least he'd get an adventure out of his last month home. Arthur might as well make it count.

His mind swam with thoughts of what the next day would bring. Anxieties mixed their way in the more he thought about it. What if he forgot to bring something important? What if he got lost? What if his car broke down? What if he got into an accident? The possibilities of things that could go wrong were endless. But he knew he would back out of the entire trip if he kept thinking that way.

Alice Kirkland poked her head into her son's bedroom. "What are you still doing awake, love?" she asked. "Aren't you leaving for your trip in the morning? It's nearly midnight. You're not having second thoughts, are you?"

Arthur lazily turned his head to look at his mother. "Of course not," he assured her. "I'm just a bit nervous, you know? What if I finally find Al and he decides that he doesn't want to see me?"

"Then you will have the satisfaction of knowing that you tried," she answered, walking into his room and sitting on the edge of his bed. Her fingers ruffled her son's messy, blond hair. "I doubt he'd do that, though. You two had a special bond. Who knows; maybe he's wanting to find you too?"

.

Sixth Grade

"It doesn't seem real that you're moving in a month," Alfred Jones sighed as he sat on his best friend's bed. "It's going to be really weird without you around anymore. Like, who am I supposed to hang out with? I don't want to deal with the annoying people in class by myself, Arthur. Your sarcasm is what keeps me alive."

"Unfortunately, you may have to find another life force, Al," Arthur replied, forcing himself to smile. Just that small act of forcing a smile made him nauseous. He wished that he could just stay behind in the town and live with Alfred or something, but he knew his mother wouldn't hear of it. "This really blows."

"You can say that again," the bespectacled boy grumbled. He was silent for a moment before nearly pouncing on Arthur. "I've got it! I'm not going to let you forget me! Let's make something that we can always keep with us, and we can use to to make sure we always remember each other! What do you think?"

"Sounds like a hassle," Arthur sighed. Yet the moment he saw the half-defeated look on his best friend's face, he gave in. "Sure, why not? What should we make?"

Alfred, being a fan of comic books, perked up quite a bit. "Hear me out, but I think we should each buy a notebook and fill it with our favorite things about each other! What do you think? It'll be filled with the very best things about us! I'll make one about you, and you can make one about me! We can put pictures and quotes and stuff in it! It'll be like you're still here even when you're gone…" His voice trailed off at the end of the sentence, having yet to accept the reality of it all. He shook his head to expel the thoughts that seemed to be swarming it. "Something like that would be nice to have, you know?" he quickly covered.

The other boy thought about it for a moment. "You know, that doesn't sound like too bad of an idea. And it's even something we can keep adding to once we're apart. I like it."

"You do?" Alfred excitedly asked. He quickly covered it up with a gruff, "Well, I mean, of course you do. It's a good idea after all."

"Though I haven't said it yet, I'm really going to miss you, Al. It'll be weird going to a new middle school without you. I don't know how I'm going to manage, but I'll try my best. And when I get my first cell phone, I'll be sure to give you the number to it." Arthur could feel the tears forming in his eyes. "We can still call each other all the time. It'll be like we're still together, you know? I mean, that could work, couldn't it?"

"Yeah," the other boy quickly replied, feeling his own tears forming. "I mean, if we think about it like that, it'll be like you never even left. This could work, right?" He quickly looked away from Arthur. "What do you say we get started on the notebooks? After all, it's not like we have much longer to work on them together."

.

Present Day

Arthur's eyes flicked open at the sound of his alarm clock. He quickly turned it off and yawned, stretching. What a strange dream to have right before leaving to find Alfred. Why would he dream about those damned notebooks? Was it because he was looking at his before falling asleep? That had to be it.

He sat up in bed and found The Very Best Things About Alfred on his bedside table. Before he could forget, he tucked it into his travel backpack that he planned to put in the passenger's seat of his car. He wanted to keep it with him at all times so he could show Alfred that he never forgot about him or their friendship.

"Good morning, love," Alice greeted when her son walked into the kitchen. "Today is the big day. Are you ready?" She smiled at him from the table, a cup of hot tea in front of her as she relaxed in her robe and nightgown. "I think this trip will be good for you two. I hope you and Alfie can make up. I remember how hard it was for you when the two of you stopped talking. You would always stop yourself in the middle dialing his phone number." Her smile grew wider. "I'm so proud of you for wanting to go and fix things before you leave. I really did raise a wonderful young man, didn't I?"

Arthur could feel the blush darkening his cheeks. "Oh, come on, Mum," he sighed. "I'm trying to keep from getting too sentimental on the first day. Please try to help me out with that."

Alice chuckled to herself. "You're always so serious, Arthur," she fondly stated. "Just like your father." Her laughter filled the kitchen. "He should be awake soon anyway. I know he'd like to see you off."

"It's not like I'm leaving just yet," Arthur said, placing a slice of bread in the toaster. "Mum, is it okay that I'm nervous? I honestly feel like backing out from all of this, but I know it wouldn't be right, especially if Alfred has already gotten wind of my plan. It's just hard. If I'm honest, I don't know how I'm going to take it if he decides not to see me. It sounds stupid, but Alfred is the one person I wouldn't be able to bear being rejected by."

"You're so strong, Arthur," his mother stated. "When we moved here, you didn't even openly complain once. You were always so helpful when we needed you. I never saw you cry or get upset over the fact that we forced you to leave everything behind to come with us. If you're still just as strong, then finding Alfred will be a piece of cake. I know that if you're still just as strong as you were when we moved, then you'll get through to Alfie and it'll be as if nothing had ever happened." She beckoned her son over and kissed the top of his head. "I guess it's just me who will have to be strong this time. I'll miss you while you're gone. Please remember to call and check in."

"Of course I will," he replied, as if his mother's worries were preposterous. "You know, I suddenly feel as if everything is going to be okay."

"Your father will be helping keep an eye on your bank account, but please call us if there are any extra expenses that will need instant covering. We won't let you go broke. After all, this is the first time you have ever asked us for anything that wasn't a necessity. We are glad to fund the entire trip. All we ask is that you have fun and keep in touch."

"Of course, Mum."

.

Nearly six hours later, Arthur pulled up outside of a duplex in a town four hours from his own. He took a deep breath and checked his appearance in his rearview mirror. Having no knowledge of the kind of person he was meeting up with was, he mentally prepared himself and got out of his car, quickly locking it behind him.

Slinging his travel backpack over his shoulder, he walked up to the door listed as "Arlovskaya" and knocked. His heart pounded in his chest and he desperately tried to calm it before the door was answered.

Moments later, the front door swung open and a steely pair of blue eyes stared at him through the storm door. The girl they belonged to didn't look as if smiling was her favorite activity. She kept a straight face as she tied her hair up in a bow without breaking eye contact.

Arthur finally found his voice. "Erm, hello. My name is Arthur Kirkland. I'm looking for a woman by the name of Natalia Arlovskaya. Would you happen to be her?"

"I am," she stated, expression never changing. "I've been expecting you. Please come in and make yourself comfortable. This might take awhile, so I'm sorry in advance." Her tone sounded disinterested, but her words told him otherwise. Perhaps she struggled with expressing her true feelings about things. She let Arthur in and led him to an immaculately clean living room. "Could I get you something to drink?"

"Ah, no thank you," he answered, slowly sitting down on the couch. "I'm good for now." He chose his words carefully. "Alfred's mother told me to come to this address and speak with you if I want to find him. What did that mean?"

"Well, what I tell you depends on how determined you are in finding him," Natalia coolly replied. "I've heard what he really thinks of you, and I'm wondering how much of the truth you would be able to handle. I want to hear you tell me with your own voice, are you really committed to finding Alfred after all this time? It's been three years since you two dropped all contact. Why are you wanting to find him now, of all times? What reason is so important that you need to find him before you leave?"

"Alfred was my best friend," Arthur slowly began. "Our falling out was rather difficult on me. It was the worst thing to ever happen to me other than moving. In about a month, I will be leaving the country to study abroad. I want to make up with him before leaving."

Natalia seemed to weigh it all in her head for a moment before responding. "That sounds like reason enough. I'll tell you what all I know."

The young man on the couch gulped. Where in the world was this all going?


	3. Chapter 3

Four Years Previous

Alfred Jones grasped at the strap of his messenger bag tightly as he walked into his new high school. He gulped as he quickly stepped out of the way of a group of upperclassmen who were running past him. This would definitely take some getting used to, that was for sure. His body heaved a heavy sigh as he thought of his best friend. Was Arthur having as rough of a time as he was? More than anything, he just wanted Arthur there with him on their first day of high school, but unfortunately, Arthur lived three time zones away. With another heavy sigh, he trudged off to find his locker.

Once he found his locker, he leaned against it heavily and looked down the long row of identical metal doors. If Arthur was there, would his be on that same row? Alfred shook his head vigorously before starting his first attempt to open the metal storage space. He couldn't be thinking about Arthur, not when there were still so many things to figure out before classes started that morning.

"Good morning!" a cheery voice greeted. A boy with shoulder-length brown hair stood at a nearby locker. His green eyes smiled at Alfred along with his lips. "I don't believe we've met before. I'm Toris Laurinaitis, and you are?"

"Alfred Jones," the other boy replied, grateful for a distraction. He smiled sheepishly. "I've been going to a private school up until now, so I don't exactly know anyone. It's my first time ever attending public school."

"Is that so?" Toris asked, cocking his head to the side with interest, smile never wavering. "Well, welcome to public school. I assure you it's not as great as anyone may say it is." He chuckled to himself as Alfred left out a small pfft. "Do you have your schedule? Would you mind if I took a look at it?"

"Go ahead," Alfred encouraged, handing over the piece of paper he had printed off before going to school that morning. "I came for the orientation, so I know where everything is. I guess my only issue now is getting to classes on time. In my middle school, we all stayed in the same room all day, and our teachers would come to us."

"Right on," the brunet stated, looking over his companion's school schedule. "Your first hour is right next to mine, Alfred, so I can walk there with you if you'd like. Next is gym class, and I assume you know where that is." He looked up for a moment to see Alfred giving him a thumbs-up. A smile graced his features as he gaze returned to the sheet of paper in his hands. "Woah, you're already in trigonometry as freshman?!" His expression was one of absolute awe and disbelief. "Shit," he muttered to himself. "We have fourth hour home economics together, and also the same lunch period." He blinked in disbelief once more. "You're in advanced chemistry, too?! What kind of school did you even go to?!"

Alfred flushed from embarrassment. "I, uh, don't know how to respond to that," he sheepishly admitted, scraping at the linoleum floor with the toe of his sneaker.

The other boy, realizing the effect of his words smiled comfortingly at his blond companion. "I'm sorry, Alfred. I didn't mean to embarrass you. But it looks like we have our last two classes together after your civics class."

"Awesome!" the blond replied. "At least I have a few classes with someone that I somewhat know. Just wait until I tell Arthur about how I made a friend on my first day!" The relieved smile he had been wearing was instantly gone at the mention of his best friend. "So where are our first-hour classes?" he asked, quickly changing the subject.

Toris chose to ignore the change in Alfred's demeanor. "They're right this way," he said, pointing down the hallway. "I'll show you." As much as he wanted to ask his new friend about that Arthur person, he knew it was best to let things be.

.

Alfred found himself an empty seat in his first hour classroom, hopefully in an area where he wouldn't attract much attention. He set his backpack down next to his chair and scanned the room, quietly observing the people he would have to share the beginnings of his mornings with on weekdays. What a headache. Though they were all the same age as him, they seemed much younger and more immature than he was. Toris was nothing like the two guys sitting to his right that were making sexual innuendos about the girl who had just entered the classroom. Alfred felt bad for her, especially since she was actually really pretty, even if her scowl seemed engraved into her facial features.

The girl weaved her way through the classroom until she stood before the guys who had been making comments. "I heard what you said," she flatly stated. She leaned over the boys, an air of intimidation surrounding her. "Say that shit again and I will cut your balls off," she growled. Her thin hands grabbed the two boys' hair before she unceremoniously knocked their heads together like a pair of cymbals. She then focused her glare on Alfred, who had been unable to look away throughout the whole ordeal. "What the hell are you looking at?" With a huff, she stormed off to a desk in the back corner of the room.

Alfred gulped as she stormed past him. What had just happened? Who was that girl? And why was he suddenly so fascinated by her? Was it because she single-handedly struck fear into the hearts of two random guys, or was it her intimidation factor? Whatever it was, he was in awe and wanted to know more about her.

As luck would have it, the teacher divided them into groups of two and assigned them to the tables into the room, putting him and that girl at the same table. Being too nervous to talk to the girl, Alfred squirmed uncomfortably in his chair, casting awkward glances in her direction, yet she never looked up from the book she was reading.

"What?" she finally asked, snapping the book shut and fixing an icy blue gaze on him. "Can't a girl read in peace? Is that suddenly not allowed? You keep looking at me, and I have no idea what the hell you want."

"I was just wondering what your name was," he blurted out. "Mine's Alfred. I just transferred over here from Saint Francis's School For Boys, and I don't really know anyone. The way you handled those jerks earlier was pretty awesome, and I just really want to get to know you." It was like word vomit! He could see her expression becoming more and more confused, but he just couldn't stop talking! "I'm really bad at making conversation, as you can see, so I'm pretty hopeless at all of this."

"Natalia," she stated. The girl rolled her eyes when Alfred just stared at her in confusion. "My name is Natalia. It's nice to meet you, Alfred. It's good to see you're not like the other guys in this classroom." She then opened her book and began reading once more.

Alfred was dumbstruck with awe. He couldn't help but find her cool. Everything about her seemed so mature! Feeling his cheeks growing hot, he fumbled around his backpack for his book as well. His heart was pounding in his chest, yet he couldn't understand why. He had never felt this way before!

.

Present Day

Arthur nodded as Natalia finished telling him about how she became acquainted with Alfred. "That sounds like him," he state with a chuckle. "He always was rather awkward when it came to meeting new people, but it was almost charming as well." He shook his head, smiling and reminiscing how he had met their mutual friend. "I met him through my mum. Our mothers were friends, so we were encouraged to play together since preschool. He ran up to me on my first day and shouted in my face that he was Alfred F. Jones and that he was told to be my friend."

A small smile graced Natalia's features as she pictured it in her head. "He was always about as subtle as a brick to the face, wasn't he?" she admirably asked. "Typical Alfred." She felt a small pull in her heart as she thought more about Alfred's smiling face. "Though subtlety was never his strong point, he made up for it with heart. He loved his friends with every ounce of his being." Her gaze lifted to the man on her couch. "I was always jealous of you, Arthur. You were the one he loved the most."


	4. Chapter 4

Toris looked over at his best friend's sleeping form. It had been so long since Alfred had gotten some good sleep. He had honestly been worried that Alfred would never sleep well again, but he was now glad that he had kept those worries to himself. After all, he hadn't seen the blond this peaceful-looking in a long time.

The blond began to stir in his sleep. Apparently such peace was short-lived. "Toris?" he asked, blinking up at his friend. "What are you doing here? How long have you been sitting there?"

"Not long really," the other admitted. "I came here to tell you something, though." He withheld the information for a few moments to build up suspense, but once Alfred looked as if he were about to punch him, he gave up on the suspense. "Arthur is on his way."

Alfred's eyes widened in shock. "Wait, he is?!" he cried out. "You're not messing with me, are you?! You better not be lying to me!" He sat straight up, heart pounding madly in his chest. "I swear to God, if you're lying to me, I'll-"

"I wouldn't lie to you about this," Toris calmly stated. "Natalia texted me this afternoon and told me that Arthur is at her house as we speak. Don't worry, she's going to follow the plan. She'll only tell him her part of things."

The blond solemnly sat in his bed, twiddling his thumbs. "Yeah, Nat was always good for her word," he mused. A smile played on his lips. Arthur was really coming. "I wonder how long it will take him to get here," he thought aloud. "What do you think, Toris?"

"Well it all depends on how long it takes everyone to tell him what he needs to know," the other replied. "Perhaps a month? It also depends on if he has car troubles or not. But if I may ask a question…" He thought about how to properly word what he wanted to say. "What is the point of all of this? You two had a falling out, if I remember correctly. Why does he still mean so much to you?"

"Don't you get it, Toris?" Alfred groaned, leaning back against his pillows. "Arthur is my best friend. Falling out or not, I refuse to ever give up on that fact. Isn't that enough of a point right there?" He sighed and stared up at the ceiling. "I just can't believe he's actually coming. To be honest, about a year ago, I had started to give up all hope of ever speaking to him, and now I hear he's on his way here. It's like I have butterflies in my stomach from all of the excitement. I haven't felt this way in years!"

"Good for you," Toris grumbled, still jealous over the fact that Arthur still ranked higher than he did on the friendship scale. "Anyway, that's all that I came to tell you today, but I'll keep you updated."

"Thanks, Toris. I really mean it. You're one of the best friends I've got."

"But you'll never be as good as Arthur," was all that Toris heard. Though Alfred hadn't said it aloud, the brunet knew that was what he intended. He hated thinking that way about Alfred, but it was an undeniable fact. In Alfred's heart, there was only room for one, whether platonic or romantic. And that one was Arthur. Nobody else would do.

.

Arthur blinked in surprise for a moment, unsure of if he had heard Natalia correctly. Alfred loved him the most? There was no way that would be possible. First off, they were both guys, and second off, they'd had a huge falling out at the end of their freshman year of high school. After all that time, there was no way Alfred could harbor anything other than hatred for Arthur. At least that's what the green-eyed boy told himself. If Alfred loved him the most, out of everyone else he knew, it wouldn't make sense. They had hurt each other too badly in their falling out for something like that to happen.

"I believe you are mistaken, Natalia," the boy said, taking a deep breath. "The last time I spoke to Alfred, many things were said. Many things that could never be taken back. There is no way he could harbor any feeling other than hatred for me."

Natalia stood up and walked over to the boy on her couch. She leaned over him, face inches from his, an aura of intimidation and malice enveloping her. "Are you trying to say I'm a liar?" she questioned, voice like ice.

"Not at all!" Arthur assured, throwing his hands up in surrender. "Just call it a feeling, I guess. Alfred and I were not on the best of terms at all when our friendship ended. Granted, a lot of it was my own fault, and I regret that. But in knowing that it was my fault, that's how I came to the conclusion that he has to hate me for all of it."

"He doesn't, though," she sighed, walking to a chair a safe distance away from Arthur and sitting back down. "I don't think there's any way he could ever hate you, now that I think about it." She shook her head, chuckling bitterly to herself. "The rest of us always came second to you, even after the falling out. He never talked to any of us about it, but it changed him, Arthur. After shit went down between the two of you, he wasn't our Alfred anymore. It was as if he became an entirely different person."

.

Four Years Previous

After class, Alfred decided to take his chances and talk to Natalia again. She just seemed too interesting to be left alone. There was something in the back of his mind that kept telling him that he needed to get to know this girl. Though she seemed pretty aloof, it made him all the more curious. What would be so wrong about attempting to befriend her? The least she could do is ignore him.

"Hey Natalia," he said, catching up to her on her way out the door. "Uh, I'm new to this school, and I don't exactly have many friends…"

"I don't see where that is my problem," she flatly stated, refusing to look his way. Natalia stepped out into the hall, doing her best to lose Alfred in the crowd of students rushing around them.

Alfred refused to let her shake him off. "I was just wondering if we could be friends or something. You seem pretty cool, and I'd like to get to know you better."

Natalia rolled her eyes. "I'm sure there are plenty of other 'cool' people you can get to know. This school is full of them. Go ask one of them instead."

Desperate, he reached out and grabbed her hand, causing her to turn to him. "No, it has to be you!" he insisted. "I want you to be my friend." He flashed her his most charming smile. "Please, Natalia?"

Flustered, she snatched her hand back and stomped off ahead of him. "Fine!" she called back to him, irritated. "But don't touch me again!" She made sure she was far away from him before bringing a hand to her flushed cheeks. They were impossibly hot, and she couldn't believe that some random guy had the audacity to come up and just grab her hand like that. No one ever touched her! Not even her own family.

Natalia looked over her shoulder just in time to see Alfred turn and walk into another classroom. Who was he, and why was he so insistent on becoming her friend? Why did it have to be her and no one else? There was something different about this Alfred Jones guy, and she was going to make it her mission to find out what it was.


	5. Chapter 5

Natalia felt as if she were going mad. For the first week of school, Alfred followed her like a puppy. If it wasn't her, it was that Laurinaitis kid. Sure, he was cute and all, but why did he have to be with one of them at all times? Didn't he have any other friends? By the time Friday came around, she nearly bit Alfred's head off when he approached her.

"Don't you have any friends other than me and that one guy?" she asked, exasperated. "Like, you're always with one of us. What can I do to get you to back down a bit? Do I need to hide in the bathroom or something?"

The spectacled boy blinked in surprise. "Good morning to you too, Natalia," he said, cocking his head to the side in confusion. "Is something wrong?"

"Did you not just fucking hear me?!" she nearly shouted at him. "Do you have selective hearing or something? What part of anything I just said gave you the impression that anything was actually going right?"

"Number 7: He has his own way of thinking, and there's no way to change that, no matter how desperately you may want to," Alfred simply stated. He smiled at Natalia as she stared at him, dumbfounded.

"What did you just say to me?" she asked, blinking at him.

"It's one of the very best things about me," he cheerfully explained. "My best friend moved across the country over the summer, and we made lists of the best things about each other. I just told you number seven on that list." He blushed, looking down at the floor. "Is that weird or something?"

"You are, without a doubt, the strangest person I have ever met," Natalia groaned back, shaking her head. "I swear to God, you are the most unpredictable person on this planet."

"That's number twelve!" Alfred excitedly exclaimed.

"Oh my God!" she shouted, slamming her head into the nearest locker. "Dude, stop!"

.

Present Day

"Wait, wait, wait," Arthur quickly interjected. "You mean to tell me that Alfred actually told you about those stupid notebooks?" He flushed with embarrassment. "Jesus Christ, he's a fucking idiot. I can't believe him." He shook his head in disbelief. "I cannot believe that idiot told you about that. He's just…" His voice trailed off. "What all did he tell you about those?"

"He didn't just tell me," Natalia stated. "Alfred showed the one he made about you to me the first time I went to his house. Up until maybe a year ago, he was still adding to it, too. But by that point, it was just sad, you know? He didn't know when to quit…"

"Number eighteen," the blond sighed. "That idiot…" He looked up at the girl across the room. "Why did he care so much about those stupid books anyway? It was just something silly we decided to do when I moved away. Sure, it helped us cope better than anything else could have at the time, but why did he hold on so strongly to it?"

"Maybe it was silly to you, but to Alfred it was everything. What part of you being his best friend did you not get? He couldn't replace you or see anyone on your level, no matter how hard he tried. It made it so hard for him to make friends. Every person he met, he would compare to you, and most people didn't like that. True, some, like Toris, would try to surpass you, but no one ever came close." Natalia clenched her fists, mentally reminding herself not to say anything more than what Alfred wanted her to. "You really piss me off, Arthur. Why couldn't you see how much you meant to him?"

"Excuse me, but I have no idea what you're talking about," he interjected. Just as he was about to continue, his cell phone began to play an all-too-familiar tune. "Pardon, but I need to take this." After receiving Natalia's blessing, he quickly answered. "Hello?"

"Your mom just told me that you're on a cross-country roadtrip for the summer, and I want to know why the hell you didn't tell me anything about it!" Elizaveta Hédérváry shouted through the phone. "You didn't find it important enough to tell your fucking girlfriend about?! Remind me again why I love you, because I'm having some trouble remembering!"

"Liz, darling, I'm in the middle of something right now," he quietly said, knowing full well that Natalia had heard that entire outburst. "May I call you back this evening to explain myself once I reach my hotel?"

"You're lucky that I love you, you understand?!" she shouted. "If you don't call me tonight, you're in the fucking doghouse until further notice, got it?!" With a click she hung up.

Arthur rubbed his temples, sighing. "I'm sorry about that, Natalia," he groaned. "Elizaveta can be a bit of a headache. Where were we?" He looked up at the smirking girl across the room from him. "What?"

"You're still with her?" Natalia scoffed. "I figured you two would have broken up years ago. After all, wasn't she the key factor in the falling out between you and Al?"

He froze, staring at her, dumbfounded. "How do you know about any of that?" he slowly asked.

"Arthur, what kind of people did you think you were going to meet this summer?" she sadistically laughed. "Before you can see Al, you're going to have to meet all of his strongest confidantes. It's going to be brutal for you, especially if you're still dating that bitch. If you think of it from a gaming aspect, it's like you're going to have to fight all of the mini-bosses before getting to the main boss himself. No cheats. Just pure skill. This is what he wants."

He suddenly felt so small. How much did Natalia really know about him? The amount of information she already held was scary enough to make him want to run for the hills, but he knew he needed to see Alfred before he left. And if he needed to press on through all of his friends to reach him, he was more than willing to. After all, if he was Alfred's best friend after all of this, like Natalia had stated many times, then it was his duty to do so. He couldn't give up halfway through or at the beginning with Natalia. He was going to see this through. Arthur Kirkland was not a quitter.

"If that's so," he began, "then please proceed, Natalia. I'm listening."

.

Four Years Previous

Alfred sat in his bedroom that night, looking through his little book he had made with Arthur. The Very Best Things About Arthur. Even though they had technically finished them before the other boy moved away, Alfred kept finding more and more things to put in it. He wondered if Arthur was doing the same thing at his house.

A soft knock at his bedroom door brought his thoughts to that present moment. Amelia Jones poked her head in and smiled. "Honey, Arthur is on the phone. Would you like to speak with him?"

He jumped up from his bed and bolted down to the bottom of the staircase. His family had a small corded home phone plugged into the wall, so he would have to sit in the chair next to it or even on the floor to talk to him, but it was worth it. After all, whenever he heard Arthur over the phone, all he needed to do was shut his eyes, and it felt as if he were still there.

"Hey!" he energetically greeted, picking the phone up off of the chair, replacing it with himself. "How was your first week of high school, Arthur?"

"Everyone in my school is an idiot, Al," the other boy simply stated, causing his friend to laugh. "Our school was definitely more advanced than this one, and people think I'm a snob because I'm smarter than them."

"That's because they don't know you yet," Alfred chirped. "Once they get to know you, they'll all come around and you'll have tons of friends, I guarantee it. You're just shy and take longer to warm up to people."

"No, I'm pretty sure they're all just idiots, Alfred."

"You're just saying that because you haven't been able to make any friends. Don't worry, Arthur. Soon, everyone at your school is going to notice the very best things about you and they'll all want to hang out with you."

Arthur sighed. "I suppose you're right," he agreed. "Why is it that you always know how to calm my anxieties?"

"Because I'm your best friend."

If only those two had known that these peaceful and fun conversations would end before too long.


	6. Chapter 6

With each day that passed, Alfred found himself becoming more and more intrigued by Natalia. She was like a puzzle to him. One day, she would be nice, and the next, she’d nearly bite his head off over something that hardly even made sense. He would go to school, never knowing what to expect from her, but he was determined to figure out the small, hot-headed girl. After all, there had never been a puzzle that Alfred Jones couldn’t solve.

Finally, Natalia had enough. “What is your deal?” she finally asked, exploding on Alfred in the schoolyard one September morning. “I don’t understand you! No matter what I do, how I act, how I behave, your attitude for me never changes! Aren’t you sick of me?”

“Why would I be sick of you?” he asked, confused. “Wouldn’t that make me a shitty friend? I’m not that type of person.”

“But I don’t want to be friends with you!” she finally shouted, exasperated. “Why can’t you get that through your thick skull?! I can’t take it anymore! I don’t want to be your friend!”

“Then how about my girlfriend?” Alfred casually asked. “Would that be better? I wouldn’t mind it at all.”

For a moment, Natalia felt as if her brain had completely shut down. Had he really just said that to her? He wanted to be her boyfriend? She’d never dated anyone before, so she didn’t really know what to expect when being asked out, but it surely wasn’t something like that. Did he mean it? Did Alfred Jones really want to date someone as temperamental as her?

“Excuse me, what?” she slowly asked. “Did you just ask what I think you did? You want me to be your girlfriend?”

Alfred shrugged and smiled at her. “Why not? We already spend a lot of time together. It’s not like it would be too drastically different from how we are now, right?”

Natalia blushed. “I mean, I guess you have a point,” she quietly stated. She stared down at her sneakers for a few moments as she thought. After a few moments, she had made up her mind. “Sure,” she decided. “Why not? Let’s try it.”

He smiled so brightly that it even made his eyes shine. “Really?” he asked. “I’ve never had a girlfriend before, so please don’t be too harsh on me as I learn the ropes, okay?”

She scraped the dirt beneath her with the toe of her sneaker. “I’ve never had a boyfriend before, so no worries. We’ll figure it out along the way, you know? Together.” Her heart was pounding in her chest. What had this boy done to her? Even if he was the only boy who regularly spoke to her, she didn’t expect him to just suddenly ask her to be his girlfriend, especially in the manner of which he did. Though she couldn’t figure out why she had told him yes, the swelling, fluttery feeling in her chest assured her that she had made the right choice.

.

Present Day

“That’s right!” Arthur suddenly exclaimed. “I knew your name was familiar. You were Al’s first girlfriend! I’ve been trying to figure that out all afternoon!” Satisfied with his realization, he looked back up at Natalia. “You know, he always talked about you.”

Natalia blinked in surprise. “He did?” she asked, stunned. “What sorts of things did he say?” A light blush dusted her cheeks. “I always wondered if he ever talked about me to you, if I’m honest. Because let me tell you, you were who he always talked about to me. The whole time we dated, I always felt as if I was second-best to him, you know?”

“I assure you that wasn’t the case,” he replied. “He called me nearly every night and went on and on about all of the things you two did together. The first time he referred to you as his girlfriend to me, I could hardly understand him through his excited giggles. He was so proud to have you for a girlfriend and talked about you to me at any chance he got.”

She blinked a few times, eyes glossy. “Thank you, Arthur,” she softly stated. “You have no idea how badly I’ve always wanted to hear something like that.” Her blue eyes went to the clock on her wall. “It’s starting to get late. You should probably get to your hotel. Come back here tomorrow morning, okay? How does ten sound?”

“It sounds great,” Arthur replied, standing up. “I’ll see you in the morning then. I hope that you sleep well tonight.” He walked over to the front door and slipped his shoes on.

“Tonight, I know I’ll sleep better than I have in years,” she told him. “After all, now I know what Alfred truly thought of me after years of wondering. Thank you, Arthur. Drive safely, and I’ll see you tomorrow.”

After seeing Arthur off, Natalia shut her front door and sunk to the floor in front of it as she burst into tears. “He really did care about me!” she wailed, knowing that no one else would hear her in that moment. “Alfred really cared about me!”

.

“So explain to me what the hell made you do something this crazy!” Elizaveta shouted at Arthur over the phone. “You decided to go on this wild goose chase on a whim and planned it all in two days without telling me?!” Her fury was quite evident. “We promised to communicate with each other, Arthur! This is how trust gets broken!”

Arthur sighed. “Liz, I know I should have told you before I left,” he began. “You have every right to be angry with me. But this is important to me. I can’t leave the country without settling things with Alfred. I’ve told you about everything that happened between us. You should know how important this is to me.”

“So you can go settle things with someone you haven’t talked to in three years before leaving the country, but you can’t spend time with your own girlfriend?!” She wasn’t, by any means, going to settle down anytime soon from the way it sounded. “This old friend you lost touch with three years ago is suddenly more important than the girl you’ve been dating for nearly four years?! That’s pretty messed up if you ask me! You’re about to go to school in another country, and instead of spending time with your girlfriend before then, you’re going and meeting up with strangers all in an attempt to try to reconcile with someone who may not even want to see you after all this time?!”

“That’s the thing, Liz,” he replied. “From what Natalia had stated numerous times today, Alfred does want to see me.”

“If he wanted to see you or even talk to you, then he would have already! He wouldn’t have waited years for you to reach out to him! This is manipulation, and you know it, Arthur! I can’t believe you’re doing something like this!”

“If all you’re going to do is yell at me, then I’m going to hang up. I’m not in the mood for this right now, Elizaveta.” Arthur rolled his eyes. “You aren’t the only person in my life who is important to me.”

“But I was the only one who stuck by your side, you pretentious jerk!” There was a sharp click as she hung up on him.

He sat down on his hotel bed. She was right that this was absolutely crazy, but he still felt that it was something he needed to do. If anything, he needed the closure. What was so hard to understand about that? While he hated upsetting Elizaveta, there was no way he could just give up and go back home to her. Why couldn’t she understand that?

.

The next morning, Natalia opened her door at the sight of Arthur, welcoming him into her house. She seemed so much more friendly than she had the previous day. Was she really that happy about what he had told her? “You really did come back,” she stated. “I can see that you really are serious about finding him. I’m glad to know that.”

“You seem more cheerful today,” he replied. “Did something happen?”

Natalia thought back to the night before. Her cheeks turned red as she remembered all of the tears she had cried the night before. But there was no doubt that she felt much, much better about the entire situation after what Arthur had told her. “Nothing in particular. I’m always this happy.”

He smiled to himself as he made his way to her living room and sat back in the same spot he was in the previous day. There was no way that she was always that happy. When he had met Natalia the day before, he didn’t even know if she actually knew how to smile. Granted, she wasn’t exactly smiling at the moment, but she sure wasn’t scowling anymore. Arthur wouldn’t be surprised in the least if she were to choose to frolic into the living room when it was time for her to continue with her story. Did Alfred really mean that much to her?

She walked into the room and sat back down in her chair before eyeing Arthur. “So, are you ready to continue?” she asked, raising an eyebrow at him. Fixing him with a level gaze, she stared at him until he nodded. “Good. Then let’s continue. After all, I still have a lot more to tell you.”

.

Three Years Previous

The first two weeks of Alfred’s first relationship flew by before he even knew it. Every night, he would call up Arthur and tell him the fun things that he and Natalia would do together, his best friend always enthusiastic, even if it wasn’t always as sincere as it should be. But all he wanted was to stay connected to his best friend, yet all he could talk about was Natalia. Sometimes he would sprinkle in things about Toris, but ever since he started dating Natalia, Toris appeared to be avoiding him.

Finally, having enough of Toris ignoring him, Alfred decided to approach him. “Hey, what’s been up, Toris?” he asked, cocking his head to the side. “I haven’t really been seeing much of you lately. Has everything been okay?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?” the other boy asked, flipping through his planner.

“Dude!” Something about Toris diverting his attention infuriated Alfred. Any time he had previously spoken with his friend, the brunet always maintained eye contact. What had he done to make Toris act this way? “Will you at least look at me when we’re talking?” He reached out and smacked Toris’s planner out of his hands and onto the floor. “You’re being a dick!”

“So I’m the one being a dick?” He glared at Alfred. “You’re the one who literally just slapped my planner out of my hand! What’s wrong with you?!”

“You’ve been avoiding me these past two weeks! What is your problem?! What did I do to you?!” Alfred wasn’t normally one to get so upset over receiving the cold shoulder, but for some reason, it bothered him when it was Toris. “I don’t understand!”

“You seriously have no idea what you did? Surely someone must have told you about me, which caused you to do this! I’m tired of people using me and then walking all over my feelings like that! I know she’s beautiful! I’ve known since I was five! Why did it have to be you?!”

“Toris, what are you talking about?” Alfred asked, confused. “You’re not making any sense. Who are you referring to?”

“Don’t play stupid with me! Every guy I befriend always does this to me!” Toris’s face was red, and he looked as if he were about to deck the boy before him at any moment. “Why did it have to be you, Al?! Huh?!”

The blond was growing more and more confused by the second. “You don’t make any sense. I can’t communicate with you if you’re just going to be spouting gibberish like this! Just say it!”

“I hate cocky assholes like you!” Toris shouted. “Guys like you always undermine people like me because you know you can push me over! I should’ve never talked to you in the first place! Especially if I knew you were going to do this to me!”

“But what did I do?!” Alfred demanded. “Just say it!”

“Stop playing dumb! I know that you know I’ve been crazy about Natalia since Kindergarten!”

Alfred blinked in surprise. “I knew that?” he asked, incredulous. “How could I have known that when all you did was avoid and ignore me? Friends communicate, Toris!” He frowned, an expression that didn’t suit his usually-cheerful face. “I guess maybe I was the only one who thought we were friends. My bad. I won’t bother you anymore.”

Before Toris could respond, he dashed off to his next class, swearing to himself to never mention a word of this to Natalia.


	7. Chapter 7

After the falling out between them, Alfred and Toris avoided each other like the plague. Without Toris, Alfred was desperate to branch out with his sociability and make new friends. He began talking to anyone who would give him the time of day, which caused him to make friends left and right, yet none of the friendships went deeper than talking in the hallways and sometimes in class. Alfred began to feel desperate, until a new girl transferred to his high school halfway through the first quarter.

Her name was Charlotte Schmit, but she insisted on being called Charlie by everyone in class. She had long, blonde hair that curled into soft ringlets at the ends and big, sparkling green eyes. And the best part was that she was assigned a seat next to Alfred in two of his classes. He was determined to be friends with her.

“Uh, hey Charlie, do you have anyone to eat lunch with?” he asked her after class. “I mean, if you want, you’re more than welcome to eat with my girlfriend and I if you’d like. The more the merrier.”

“Thanks, Alfie Jones,” Charlotte chirped at him, smiling widely. “I’d love to!” She walked with him down the hallway, stopping upon seeing Natalia. “Wow! She looks so lovely! Who is she?” Charlotte discreetly gestured to Natalia, eyes lighting up. “Do you know her?”

Alfred grinned at Charlotte. “You really think she’s lovely?” he asked. “Well, Charlie, she just so happens to be my girlfriend.” He waved Natalia over and waited for her to reach them before beginning introductions. “Hey babe, this is Charlie. It’s her first day here, so I thought I’d welcome her properly. Charlie, this is my beautiful girlfriend, Natalia.”

“It’s so nice to meet you,” Charlotte said with a smile. “I was just commenting to Alfie Jones about how beautiful you were at a distance, but now I can see that you’re just as beautiful up close. He’s lucky to have a girlfriend like you.”

“I think he’s lucky too,” Natalia replied, a smirk playing on her lips. “Thank you, Charlie. You’re too kind. I hope our dear Al hasn’t bothered you too much. He recently had a falling out with a friend of ours that he was close to, so he’s been trying to make more friends.”

“No problems here,” the other girl enthused. “I’ll be your new friend, Alfie Jones! It sounds fun!”

Alfred smiled sheepishly and snuggle-hugged his girlfriend. “Natalia, you always say for me what I don’t have the courage to. No wonder I adore you so much.” He kissed her cheek, causing Natalia to blush a brilliant red. “Charlie, you were absolutely correct. I truly am lucky.”

Charlotte smiled. “I’m glad that you know that. It would be a shame if you didn’t.” She winked at Natalia, who managed to give her a small smile. “I hope that the three of us can all be good friends. It’s been awhile since I’ve met someone so energetic, and an even longer while since I’ve met someone so cute.” She looked to the other girl. “Please let me know if I’m being too much, and I’ll stop. I’m also in the market for new friends, and you two seem ideal.”

“You’re fine,” the other girl replied. “And not that this conversation isn’t great and all, but I am starving. Do you mind if we move this conversation to the cafeteria? Charlie and I can go grab seats for us if you don’t mind getting us food, babe?”

“Sure thing,” Alfred chirped. “What would you like, Charlie? I’ll grab it for you.”

“You can do that?” Charlotte asked, blinking in surprise. “If that’s the case, could you just grab e a B lunch. That one sounded great. Thanks, Alfie Jones!”

“It’s not a problem. See you guys at the table.” With that, Alfred headed off into the cafeteria.

The lunch line was long, but he managed to get through it quicker than normal, balancing three trays on his arms. He sat at the table and distributed the lunches, smiling to himself over how deep in conversation the two girls were when he had arrived. Personally, he had never seen Natalia hang out with anyone, but when observing her and Charlotte, the atmosphere was as if the girl were best friends. It made him think of him and Arthur. He wondered what his own best friend was up to.

Natalia startled him out of his thoughts when she placed her small hand on top of his. “Thanks, Al,” she told him. “I appreciate you grabbing lunch for Charlie and I. You’re truly the best.” She flashed her boyfriend one of her rare smiles. “And also, you truly did find a diamond in the rough. This girl is awesome and actually has a personality, unlike all of the other girls in our grade.”

Charlotte giggled. “Natalia, you flatter me too much,” she said, blushing. “But thank you. I appreciate that.”

Alfred smiled. “I guess I’m just a good judge of character. Number Three: I’m a good judge of character.”

“Number three?” the new girl asked. “What does that mean?”

“He and his best friend made lists of the best things about each other,” Natalia began to explain.

“The very best,” he interjected.

His girlfriend rolled her eyes. “Sorry, the very best things about each other. Anyway, his best friend moved across the country a few years ago, so they made these lists and put them in notebooks along with anything else that reminded them of each other. It’s actually pretty neat. Al here has memorized the entire list Arthur made about him, so when he hears anything about himself that reminds him of anything on the list, he’ll rattle it off along with the number.”

“That’s adorable,” Charlie enthused. She smiled at Alfred. “Your friend must really be something special, Alfie Jones. I’m glad that you have someone like him in your life.” Her eyes flittered down to her tray. “When my friends back home found out that I was moving, it was more like a ‘We’ll Remember You Fondly’ thing. But the fact that your best friend and you made notebooks to remember each other by is something that only true friends really do. I like that.”

“Yeah,” Alfred agreed, smiling to himself. “Arthur is the truest friend I’ve got, that’s for sure. He’s the only one I still talk to from middle school. Everyone else kinda snubbed me once we reached high school. It’s not like I mind it, though. They were all snobs anyway. Not exactly my kind of people.”

He glanced up at the other students in the cafeteria to see Toris sitting two tables away. There was a sharp pang of betrayal in his heart, making him wince. How could someone like Toris throw away their friendship all because of a girl? It was stupid. Why would anyone do that? Why couldn’t they have just talked it out instead of the passive-aggressive avoidance bullshit? It didn’t make sense. Was Toris hurting as badly as he was? Did Toris even care?

“Forget about him, babe,” Natalia softly said, squeezing his hand. She had followed his gaze and seen who he was looking at. “He’ll get over it eventually and come around. I don’t know what happened between you two, but I’ve known him since we were kids. He gets over things very quickly.”

Everything that isn’t you, Alfred thought to himself.

.

Present Day

“The name Charlie certainly rings a bell,” Arthur mused. “I’m certain I heard him tell me about her many times, but I think after a couple months, he started calling her something else.” He thought for a moment. “The nickname escapes me right now, but it’s fine. I’m sure I’ll remember later.”

“You will,” Natalia quietly stated, averting her eyes. “But yeah, even I was surprised about how quickly Charlie became a part of our little group. It’s probably because she was so charming and bubbly. She had a certain charisma about her, I guess. It was almost on the same level as Alfred’s. That girl was a damn miracle worker, let me tell you. Whenever there were any arguments within the friend group, she would always do her best to iron it all out and lessen the damage.”

“You speak so highly of her.”

“I suppose I do,” she answered, fiddling with a strand of her hair. “Whenever we were all together, everything felt perfect, you know? It was like we all meshed together like cogs in a machine.” She sighed. “Why did that ever have to end?”

“What ended it, Natalia?” Arthur had a few ideas on what could have, but he wanted it confirmed by her before he jumped to any conclusions.

“My dad was transferred to the East Coast for work a month after Charlie transferred. And I only had a week to say goodbye to everyone and leave them all behind. I didn’t want to drag Alfred down by leaving because he was still hung up on you moving away, so I did what I felt I had to do.”

.

Three Years Previous

“These past two months have been really great, babe,” Natalia began, looking up at her boyfriend. It was after school on a Friday, and by Monday she would be off starting her new life in Maine. The last thing she wanted was to hurt Alfred, but she didn’t know how else to go about it. He had already lost Arthur, which had a heavy impact on him. She didn’t want him to have the pain of his girlfriend moving away as well. “But I think we should end things.”

“What? Why?” he asked, panic in his voice. “Did I do something wrong? I don’t understand! I thought things were going great between us! What happened to that?”

“I just can’t do it anymore, Al,” she quietly said, refusing to meet his eyes lest she fall apart right on the spot. “It’s nothing you did. You’re amazing. Someone as amazing as you needs to be with someone equally as amazing. I’m sorry, Al.” She stood on her tip-toes and softly kissed his lips. “I just can’t anymore.”

Without another word, she walked off toward where her mother was waiting to pick her up, fighting off her tears until she was home in her barren room. Once there, she cried it all out until she fell asleep. And the next morning, she was on her way to Maine.

.

Present Day

“I remember that breakup,” Arthur quietly stated. “It hurt him really bad. You just disappeared without a trace, Natalia. How would you have felt had he done that to you?”

“I don’t know,” she mumbled. “That was the last time I ever spoke to him in person. The expression he had on his face still haunts me to this day. A couple years later, he finally coaxed Toris to give him my phone number. We talked for hours, and he seemed to be happy with how his life was going despite the falling-out you two had. You know, I’ll never understand why that falling-out happened in the first place, but I’m glad that you’re looking for him now.” She reached over onto the coffee table. “Here’s the name and address of the next person for you to talk to. I’ve never met him, but I heard he’s pretty unique. Good luck with your trip, have safe travels, and I hope you find him at the end. Give him a hug for me when you do.”

Arthur glanced down at the piece of paper in his hand. Her handwriting was neat, the address written quite clearly, much more clearly than he had written hers only days before. “Thank you, Natalia. I will be sure to. I appreciate you telling me all of this.” He walked over to the door and slipped on his shoes. “Now I’m off to find this Gilbert Beilschmidt fellow.”

“I wish you the best of luck.” Natalia held the door open for Arthur as he exited. “If there’s one thing I can say about this entire experience of these past couple days, it’s this. I’m glad that I finally got the chance to meet you, Arthur.”

“Likewise, Natalia,” he told her, flashing her a bright smile. “I am forever in your debt. As how I am not sure where this entire chase will take me, I’m glad to know that I will be able to meet the ones who helped Alfred out in my absence. I will always be indebted to each and every one of you.”

She felt a small stab of nostalgia in her heart as Arthur’s words truly hit her. “When I met you yesterday, I felt as if Alfred may have something wrong with him. You were nothing like he used to say you were. I thought you had grown up to be an asshole, but now I’ve finally realized it. You truly are exactly as Alfred said you were.”


	8. Chapter 8

Arthur laid on his hotel bed that night, pondering what the next day was going to be like. He was going to be on the road for about eight hours before he reached this guy’s house. Why did everyone have to live so far apart? It was frustrating. Then again, it was an adventure. He had to remember that. And what was an adventure without travel? It wasn’t like he hated driving anyway. But eight hours? Thank the Man Upstairs for podcasts!

He wondered how it was going to be when he was finally reunited with Alfred. Would they hug? Would they fight? There was no telling what three years of bitterness had done to him. Then again, everyone had been telling him that Alfred wasn’t bitter, but how was he supposed to believe that? Those people hadn’t been there for their final conversation. They didn’t know what the two had said to each other, those words that could make someone’s blood run cold.

Was this right of him to do? If Alfred still cared, why hadn’t he reached out? Why did Arthur have to reach out first? It was all so confusing. What did it all mean? Why did he have to go on this wild goose chase to find him? Was this some scheme of Alfred’s? Why did he have to know everything that had happened since their falling out? Was there a point to all of it?

Knowing he was going to give himself a headache with all of these questioning thoughts, he stuck his earbuds into his ears and closed his eyes, switching off the bedside lamp. He hoped that a deep and restful sleep would claim him soon and bring forward tomorrow. Perhaps then, some questions deep inside of him could be answered.

.

Arthur was on the road the next morning before the sun had even risen. He wanted to reach his destination early enough to talk to the guy. His green eyes went to the clock on his dashboard as the lights switched to the next number. 5:27AM. Though he had barely slept, he felt refreshed. Maybe it was the two coffees he had before driving. Either way, he was wide awake, his podcasts blaring from his car speakers.

One thing was troubling him. He hadn’t spoken to Elizaveta since she had hung up on him the night before. It didn’t really bother him too much, considering that she was a bit temperamental at times. There were times when he honestly wondered how they were still together, considering how they fought 95% of the time. Sometimes, he would think to himself that if they were to break up during one of their fights, he may even feel relieved.

He sighed as he saw the beginnings of the sunrise on the horizon. At least he would witness the beauty of the sunrise as he drove. For someone like him, a sunrise was a rare sight. If he wasn’t fully motivated by the thought of making up with Alfred before leaving the country for school, there was no way Arthur would even think about being up that early in the morning. 

Even on school days, he would sleep until the very last minute, and spend fifteen minutes rushing around the house and getting ready before heading out. Arthur Kirkland most certainly was not a morning person. He firmly believed that it wasn’t in his blood, although his parents were always awake before dawn. How they could manage to do that every single morning was beyond him.

He began to ponder what type of a person this Gilbert Beilschmidt was. If he was a friend of Alfred’s, did that mean he could be trusted? Would Gilbert be hostile at first like Natalia? His head spun with questions. How was he going to manage this entire trip if this was how he was going to be thinking before meeting each person?

Then his mind went to Alfred. For as long as Arthur had known him, that boy had always been straightforward, almost to a fault. Alfred’s honesty would sometimes get him in trouble with people because he always stated specifically what was on his mind and took on confrontations head-on. It left Arthur to wonder why he had to jump through so many hoops to get to his former best friend. Why was Alfred hiding behind everyone? This wasn’t the Alfred he knew. What had happened to him?

.

Arthur pulled up outside of an apartment building around two that afternoon. It most definitely looked like someone his age lived in it, in the sense that it didn’t exactly look like where a family would be living together. Then again, you could never be too sure.

He got out of his car, making sure to lock it tight behind him, and headed up the outer flight of stairs to the apartment on the second floor. Stopping at the apartment number on the paper, he reached out and knocked on the door. His heart raced a little in his chest. He felt ridiculous, going to a complete stranger’s home to find a friend of his, but if this was what Alfred wanted, it was what he would do. Even if he hated it.

The door flew open and a man with striking white hair, pale skin, and red pupils stood in its place. His eyes widened at the sight of him. “So you’re Arthur!” he excitedly greeted. “It’s great to finally meet you! I’m Gilbert! Come on in!” He led the way into a small studio apartment. “Please ignore the mess. I broke up with my boyfriend recently, and he still hasn’t come for his shit.”

Arthur looked around. The entire apartment was spotless other than a small, neat pile of clothes with a few music books on top of it. “You’re good,” he slowly said, failing to see any sort of mess. “And yes, I’m Arthur Kirkland. You must be Gilbert Beilschimdt.”

“Call me Gil!” the other man enthusiastically replied, grinning from ear to ear. “Could I interest you in something to eat or drink? It must’ve been a long drive from Nat’s place to here.”

“I’m good,” the blond replied, sitting down in a lounge chair in the living room section of the studio. “I assume you know why I’m here.”

“Of course I do!” Gilbert replied, tossing himself onto the couch. “It’s my job to tell you about Al. You are here to listen to what I have to say about him. Granted, I can only tell you my side of things, but once you’re done here, you’ll really start seeing the bigger picture. Toris would never shut up about how my role is the most important.” He rolled his eyes. “Seriously, that guy can get the stick out of his ass before I shove it further up there by force.”

Arthur blinked in surprise. This man was much more peculiar than he had originally imagined. He wasn’t sure how this was going to go, but at least he was certain that Gilbert wouldn’t be glaring daggers at him for an entire afternoon. For that, he was grateful. “So where does your story begin?” he asked.

The albino grinned. “It begins right where Natalia’s left off. Exactly one week later. Let me tell you, at that time, Al was so fucking pathetic. He was wandering around school like a kicked puppy. At that time, he and Toris were still fighting, so he had no one to sit with but Charlie. That girl is a fucking angel, that’s for sure. One afternoon, I just happened to stumble across their table. I guess you could say it was a lucky chance.”

.

Three Years Previous

“Hey, are you sure you’re okay, Alfie Jones?” Charlotte asked her friend, placing a hand over his. “The expression on your face this past week just makes me want to build you a blanket fortress to keep you happily in there until the end of time.” She sighed. “What can I do to cheer you up? I’ll do anything to make you smile again.”

Before Alfred could reply, a lunch tray was dropped on the table with a loud crash. The two looked up to see an upperclassman with albinism smirking down at them. “This spot taken?” he asked, sitting down before they could reply. “I’ve seen you around, kid.” He pointed at Alfred. “Word on the street is that you’re a genius. Is it true?”

“I guess you could say that I’m smart,” Alfred quietly replied. He looked up at the boy across the table from him. “I’m Alfred Jones, and you are?”

“Gil,” the other boy replied with a grin. “This your girlfriend?”

Charlotte glared daggers at Gilbert as Alfred reacted as if he had been unexpectedly punched in the gut. “Do you have any decency?” she demanded. She leaned across the table and muttered, “His girlfriend dumped him and moved across the country last week.”

“How was I supposed to know?” Gilbert hissed back. He cast Alfred an awkward smile. “Hey, I didn’t know, Al. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring up any bad feelings. Are you okay?” He reached across the table to pat the blond’s shoulder. “You know, if you ever need some bro time to help you get over her or whatever, I’ve got you, okay?”

Alfred let out a cynical laugh. “You sure about that, Gil?” he asked. “The last ‘bro’ of mine that I had dropped me like a bad habit the moment I started dating my girlfriend. And the one before him…” His voice trailed off as he thought about Arthur. “Nevermind.”

Noticing Gilbert’s confused expression, Charlotte quickly changed the subject. “So, Gil, what grade are you in? Alfie Jones and I are freshmen, but I saw you drive to school this morning, so I know you sure as hell aren’t.”

“My car gave it away?” the older boy laughed. “I’m a senior, bitches. This is my final year in this hellhole, and I’m so stoked about it!” He grinned manically before digging into his lunch. “I’ve got a little brother who is a grade ahead of you, but the little jerk doesn’t even say hi to me in school,” he complained between bites. “It’s kinda depressing, y’know?”

A small smile made its way to the blond boy’s face. “I’ll say hi to you in school,” he offered. “I may not be your brother, but everyone deserves a friendly greeting in the mornings.”

The albino dropped his spork and laughed. “You’re funny, Al! I think you’ve mistaken me for someone who has no friends.” He puffed up his chest and jabbed his thumb into it as a gesture to himself. “I happen to be one of the most popular guys in my grade. I just chose to sit with you two because you looked like you needed cheering up. See how nice I am?”

“That’s very kind of you, Gil,” Alfred replied, smile growing wider. “Thanks. I don’t know how you knew, but I really needed it today. It’s been a bit rough.” The bell rang, signaling ten minutes until class started again. “I should probably get going now. I have AP Chemistry across the school, and I don’t want to be late.” He stood up and grabbed his tray. “Also, if you see me in the hallway and don’t say hi, I’ll understand. I am just some random freshman, after all.”

When the blond turned around to leave the table, Gil stood up and grabbed his arm, leaning across the table. “What’s with that kind of parting?” he asked. “You think I won’t say hi to you because you’re a freshman? Well, let me tell you something about that. Normally, I won’t say hi to freshmen in the hallway because getting to know them would be a waste of time, considering I don’t have much time left in this school.” He smiled at Alfred. “But you’re an exception, Al. You can guarantee that any time I see you in the hallway, I’ll acknowledge it.”

The other boy’s cheeks flushed. “Thank you, Gil. I’m flattered.” He grinned. “And I’ll always be sure to say hi back!”

“You better!” the albino boy called out as the two freshmen left the table.

.

Present Day

Gilbert sighed and smiled to himself. “That boy is one of a kind, for sure,” he sighed, reminiscing. “And to think, Arthur, you knew that before any of us did.” He frowned to himself. “If only I was able to have more time with him, then maybe things wouldn’t be the way they are right now between us.”

“What do you mean?” Arthur asked, leaning toward the other man. “I don’t quite understand what you mean.”

“If I wouldn’t have had to go to college, then maybe I could’ve helped Al.” He glanced over at the man in the chair across the small area. “No offense to you or anything, Arthur, but if I could’ve had a little more time with him, maybe I could have helped him move on from you.”

“Move on?” the blond asked. “What do you mean?”

Gilbert smirked. “You mean to tell me you don’t know?” He let out a wild laugh. “Please tell me you’re joking! How could you not have known?!” At Arthur’s confused expression, he sat straight up, jaw dropping. “Are you serious, Arthur?!” He cast the blond a manic grin. “Alfred was head-over-heels in love with you!”


	9. Chapter 9

Gilbert’s declaration hit Arthur like a ton of bricks. Alfred was in love with him? Was that why the falling-out happened? Was that what Alfred was trying to tell him that day? The guilt welled up in the blond until he felt as if he would go mad if he didn’t say something. How could he have not realized it? When he looked back on his interactions with Alfred three years before, it now seemed so obvious!

“Wow,” was all he managed to say. Even though it was only just one word, it seemed to put an incredible amount of weight into the room. After a few moments, he spoke again. “I didn’t know. But now that I’m aware, I’m surprised that I didn’t see it all along. It leaves me to wonder what would’ve happened if I had listened to what he had to say that day. Would things have ended differently?”

“That’s something you’d have to talk to him about,” Gilbert simply said. “You really are a bit dense, aren’t you? Al used to say something like that about you all the time.” He chuckled to himself. “I guess all of this will be resolved soon enough, yeah? Anyway, let’s get on with the story.”

“Wait,” Arthur quickly interjected. “How obvious was it to everyone at your school?”

The albino snickered to himself before replying. “Even the people who didn’t know Al knew he was crazy about you. That’s how obvious it was.”

.

Three Years Previous

True to his word, Gilbert acknowledged Alfred anytime he saw him in the hallway, bringing a smile to the blond’s face and a returned acknowledgement. It felt so empowering to have a popular senior blow off his conversation with other popular people for a brief moment to say hi or greet him. Something about it caused a small, fluttering feeling in Alfred’s chest every time it happened. Soon, he realized that he was slightly blushing each time he returned the sentiment. What was up with that?

Gilbert dropped his tray onto Alfred and Charlotte’s lunch table, his way of signifying that he would sit with them that day. Granted it happened about twice a week, it still startled both freshmen.

“Will you please stop doing that?” Charlotte complained, rolling her eyes. “I nearly have a heart attack each time.”

The senior pointed a finger at her. “I know your brother,” he simply stated, a smug smile on his lips.

“Which one?” she asked. “I have two.”

“I met Tim at a party this past weekend,” Gilbert stated. “He’s fucking awesome. I only knew he was your brother because you two look similar and have the same last name. I mean, I also asked him when we were smoking together, just to make sure.” He ignored the eye roll from Charlotte. “Do you think you’ll be that awesome when you grow into a big girl, Charlie?”

She scoffed. “If by awesome, you mean a complete failure, then no. I really hope not to be.” Charlotte crossed her arms over her chest and cast the albino a cross look. “Besides, he got arrested that night when coming home from the party. Our parents won’t pay bail, so he’s stuck in jail for awhile. Is that how awesome you want me to be?”

“Jail is no place for a princess, now is it?” the senior sneered. He smirked at Charlotte before turning to Alfred. “How was your weekend, Al?”

Alfred had appeared to be deep in thought, but now seemed startled out of it. “Me? My weekend?” he asked. “Uh, it was okay, I guess. I took my dog out for a walk on Saturday. Sunday, I went to the gym by my house. It was a typical weekend, I suppose. Nothing out of the ordinary.”

“What a domestic life you live, Mr. Jones,” Gilbert teased, grinning.

“Alright, spill it,” Charlotte sighed. “What has you so bitter today? Something is obviously wrong if you’re picking on our dear Alfie Jones. What happened?”

Gilbert scoffed and then frowned. “Okay, fine,” he grumbled. “I’m Jonesing hard. My brother caught me smoking, and he ratted me out to our grandpa, who we live with. That old man raised hell when I got back from that party this weekend and said he’s keeping close tabs on me. I haven’t smoked in almost two days, and I’m about to lose my mind, Charlie!”

She sighed but reached over and patted the older boy’s shoulder. “Why do you remind me so much of Tim?” she wondered aloud. “Maybe you shouldn’t smoke while you’re still in high school, Gil. Have you considered that?”

The senior turned his back to her with a grumble of, “You are absolutely no goddamn help.”

Charlotte smiled to herself and then turned to her best friend. “Finished with lunch, Alfie Jones?” she asked. “I’ll go dump our trays.” She stood up and grabbed the two empty trays. “How about you try to comfort this lost cause?” And with that, she was gone.

Alfred reached into a pocket of his backpack and pulled out a pack of sugar-free gum. He slid it across the table toward his distressed friend. “Here,” he said. “I heard that when people try to quit smoking, they sometimes try chewing gum instead. I’ve only taken one piece out of this pack, but maybe it can help you.”

Gilbert looked up at the freshman, a mixture of heartfelt thanks and disbelief on his face. This freshman, whom he was mostly shallow friends with, would do something like this? He didn’t exactly know what to think, not wanting to take advantage of genuine kindness. “You sure?” he finally asked, eyeing the pack of gum.

“I can always get more later,” the blond replied with a shrug. “Besides, you seem like you need it more than I do. It’s not a big deal.” He smiled to show his sincerity. “Just take it, Gil. It’s not like it’ll be the end of my world.”

.

Present Day

“You know, Arthur, I think that was the moment that I fell for him,” Gilbert sighed, chuckling bitterly to himself. “Can you believe that? Over something as stupid as a pack of sugar-free gum, no less.” He laughed for a moment. “But that was how I kicked my smoking habit, and it was also how I discovered my favorite gum. Could it have been because I associated it with Alfred? Maybe. But do I care about little details like that? Of course not.” His gaze then fell upon Arthur. “You must think we’re all pretty crazy to go to such great lengths to invite you into our homes and discuss Al with you, huh?”

“It’s crossed my mind a few times,” the blond admitted, “but it isn’t something I would say aloud like that.” He sighed. “I just don’t get why Alfred is surrounded by people who would go to such great lengths for him. It’s almost too unreal to be true. Who has a friend group like that?”

“Al is one of a kind,” the other man simply stated. “He’s a guy who truly believes in his friends with all of his heart. If I’m honest, I feel as if he’s one of the very few good people left in this world. And before you actually showed up at my door and showed genuine interest in what I had to say, I believed the horrible things everyone else in the group said about you behind Al’s back. But now I’m starting to truly show interest in your character.”

“What do you mean?”

“Just talking to myself. Don’t worry about me, okay?” Gilbert smirked. “Now, where was I? Let’s skip forward to three weeks later at the football game against our rival school. That’s where things get good. You see, I’d started hanging out with Alfred nearly every day by that point, and I knew that I had fallen hard.”

.

Three Years Previous

Alfred sat between Charlotte and Gilbert at a school football game one Friday night. It was growing colder and colder by the day, and the chilly night breeze felt as if it were ripping through his jacket. He decided to make an excuse to go to the concessions stand for nachos so that he could have at least a little bit of a wind block.

“Hey, could you grab me a Coke?” Charlotte asked, batting her eyes at him. “And maybe some popcorn?”

He chuckled before replying. “I’m on it, Charlie.”

“I’m kinda hungry too,” Gilbert decided, standing up as well. “I’ll go with you.” He then turned to Charlotte. “Keep tabs on the game for us.”

“Roger that,” she replied, eyes glued to the field. Unlike a lot of girls at the school, Charlotte paid close attention to the sports, whereas most of the girls paid more attention to the players.

Upon reaching the concession area, Alfred discovered, with much dismay, that a lot of other students had the same idea as him. He frowned when he realized that there wasn’t much cover from the wind left.

“You’re so easy to read,” Gilbert laughed. “Come with me.” He grabbed Alfred’s arm and took him to the entryway of the men’s restroom, which was just out of the wind with a perfect view of the concession line. “Let’s just wait here for a bit.”

“Gil, you’re a genius,” his companion laughed. He was honestly jealous that he hadn’t thought of it. “It’s no wonder people like you so much, you know? You’re always thinking a few steps ahead but don’t mind giving others the ground to follow.”

“Yeah?” he laughed. “I wouldn’t be so sure about that.” A raging blush rose in his cheeks.

“Why wouldn’t you be? You’re a born leader. You could do anything, and anyone would follow?”

“You think so?” he asked. “What if it was something like this?” Making sure no one was watching them, Gilbert slipped his fingers under the freshman boy’s chin before guiding the blond’s face to his own. He placed a sweet and gentle kiss upon the other boy’s lips. “Do you follow?”


	10. Chapter 10

Alfred blinked in surprise once Gilbert had pulled away. He was still able to feel the older boy’s lips on his own, accompanied by a slight tingling sensation that was slowly spreading through his body. What was this? He had never kissed a guy before, yet it felt more satisfying than kissing Natalia. What made Gilbert so special?

“I…” His voice trailed off as he tried to think of what to say. “What?” Alfred’s confusion clouded him from speaking logically. “Gil, you kissed me,” he stupidly stated after a few moments.

Gilbert blushed, rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment. “Yeah,” he bashfully replied, “I guess I did. I’m sorry, Al. Maybe I shouldn’t have.”

The other boy blinked in surprise from behind his glasses. “N-No!” he stammered. “T-That’s not it, Gil! I just…” Once more, his voice trailed off again as he thought of what he could say to Gilbert about the fact that they had kissed. Should he tell him that he didn’t mind it? Or maybe he could tell Gilbert that it felt nice? But would that sound stupid? All of his thoughts conflicted inside of his head until he finally spoke up. “I didn’t hate it.”

“Yeah?” the albino asked, a smirk playing on his lips. “Then would you be opposed to me doing it again?”

Blue eyes widening with surprise, Alfred chose to speak the truth. “I wouldn’t,” he decided before closing the gap between himself and the older boy once more with a kiss. Initiating it wasn’t nearly as nerve-wracking as he had originally thought it would be. No. Instead of it being nerve-wracking, it felt as if it perfectly fit the moment.

A half hour later, the two had finally made their way back to Charlotte. She looked up at them and frowned. “What took you so long?” she scoffed, accepting her Coke and popcorn from Alfred. “You guys were gone forever.”

“You wouldn’t believe how long that line was, Charlie,” Gilbert groaned, sitting down. He smiled to himself when Alfred sat back down between them. His hand gently covered Alfred’s on the cold metal of the stadium bleachers, unseen by the people around them. “It was as if everyone wanted food all at the same time.”

Alfred blushed, entwining his fingers with the older boy’s. “We had to wait for what felt like forever,” he agreed with a sigh. “I mean, we found a way to pass the time and managed, but damn.” He felt a gentle squeeze to his hand upon speaking his last comment. “Anyway, enjoy your popcorn.”

She giggled. “You’re such a sweetheart, Alfie Jones. Of course I’ll enjoy it!” Her hand reached up to toss a piece of popcorn into her mouth before she tossed one up toward Alfred as well, who caught it. “Even when you’re distracted, you can still catch popcorn in your mouth. I’m impressed.”

“Don’t doubt my skills, Charlie,” Alfred stated, grinning at her. “You know that I’m awesome at what I do.”

Charlotte cast him a mischievous glance. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say that Gil is rubbing off on you. You should be careful with that, Alfie Jones. He’s dangerous,” she teased.

“Says who, Charlie?” the older boy interrupted, grinning. “You only say I’m dangerous because you’re probably in love with me. But then again, who could blame you? I am pretty awesome, as you both know.” His grin turned to a devious smirk. “I can’t help it that I’m easy to fall for.” He gave Alfred’s hand a gentle squeeze. “There’s just something about me that’s more charming than the average men. If I knew what it was, perhaps we could find a way to tone it down. It’s both a blessing and a curse.”

“Oh, shut up,” she laughed, redirecting her attention back to the football game. “We’re in the third quarter, and I want to see how this plays out.”

.

Present Day

“Full of yourself much?” Arthur laughed, crossing his arms over his chest. “With that much confidence in yourself, you could do anything in life.”

“That’s what I used to think as well,” the albino sighed. “But I suppose that’s not how life truly works. Life happens, whether we like it or not. Our dreams remain dreams, and we end up working some dead-end job in a gas station after losing sight of what’s important to us, you know? Love affairs come and go after you lose what you believe to be the greatest love of your life. Someone new and amazing comes along and makes you want to be better, but then they give up on you and tell you that you have no future if you remain as you are. And even once you’re all alone, life goes on, Arthur.” He sighed, seeming lost in his thoughts. “Yet you always find yourself desperately reaching back to the days before things went wrong, wondering if there was anything you could have done to change how your life is going today.”

Unsure of how to respond to such a personal admission, the blond sat in silence for a moment, processing Gilbert’s words. “Do you miss Alfred?” he slowly asked after what felt like hours, though it wasn’t longer than a minute.

“All the time,” the other replied. “Sometimes I just spend my days wondering if there was anything I could have done to make things work out differently or in my favor. But then I realized it wouldn’t have worked out no matter what I did. Al and I were completely different people with completely different goals in life. Besides, no matter how desperate I was to make things work between us, I wasn’t you.”

Arthur felt his stomach sink at Gilbert’s words. Deep inside, he wondered how painful it must be for him to be in the other’s home. How must Gilbert feel to be in the same room as the seemingly only recipient of the affection of the man he loved? To him, his presence didn’t seem right. Then again, it didn’t seem right in Natalia’s home either. Was him being there to hear their stories of lost love really okay, especially with him being the only person the one they loved ever seemed to care about? What was Alfred thinking with all of this?

“Gilbert,” he softly began, “maybe I should head out for the night. I still have to book my hotel room.” He rose from his seat and suddenly felt Gilbert grab his hand. “What is it? Are you alright?”

“I don’t know how to say this without sounding forward or as if I have a hidden ulterior motive, but please stay here tonight. It’ll save you money, and maybe I won’t feel as depressed if there’s someone else here. I don’t want to creep you out, though.” Gilbert’s eyes pleaded with him, almost as if he were desperate for his company. “Yet if you are not comfortable with it, please know you don’t have to.”

For a moment, Arthur felt torn. Though he didn’t know Gilbert very well, something inside of him wouldn’t let him leave. “If you really want me to, I’ll stay. Though I don’t know what’s going on with you, I can’t bring myself to leave you alone when you seem as if you need the company.”

Humbled by Arthur’s kindness, Gilbert bowed his head. “Thanks, Arthur,” he quietly said. “While I know that you don’t know me well, trust Al on this. If I was a danger to you, he wouldn’t have had you come to talk to me.” He took a deep breath. “That said, would you like dinner? I can’t cook much, but what I can cook is almost as awesome as me.”

The blond smiled. “Yeah, Gil,” he said, “I’d like that. Thank you.” He pulled his phone out of his pocket. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to check in with the people back home.”

“By all means,” the other happily replied. “You can step into the office. Down the hallway, second door on the right. It’s comfortable in there. I’ll get started on dinner.”

“Thank you, Gilbert. I appreciate it.” He made his way down the hall and ended up in a neat and tidy office. Sitting on the small love seat, he dialed up his mother’s number and told her of his sleeping arrangements for the night. Yet when he hung up and prepared to call Elizaveta, he paused. Did he really want to talk to her? Then again, he knew she would be angry if he didn’t call. Holding his breath, he pressed the call button next to her name.

“I was afraid that you wouldn’t call,” Elizaveta softly said upon picking up her phone. “Our last conversation didn’t end so well. I was emotional, and I said some things that I probably shouldn’t have.”

“You only said what I deserved to hear,” he replied, smiling to himself. Arthur felt relieved to know that his girlfriend wasn’t mad at him.

“How’s your search going?” she asked. There was a creaking in the background, which meant she was sitting down on her bed to talk. “Have you met anyone else?”

“Yeah, I’m currently in the home of another of Alfred’s friends. He’s making dinner right now, so I went to his home office to call you. His name is Gil. I feel you would get along with him. He’s a really nice guy. I believe he’s just misunderstood.”

“You’ve always had a kind heart,” Elizaveta dreamily replied. “I think that’s why I fell in love with you, Arthur.” She was quiet for a moment. “I’m sorry that I wasn’t supportive of this from the get-go. I guess I was just confused and hurt. But now that I think about it, you didn’t get the closure you needed when it came to your best friend. You’ve always supported me when it came to my friends, and now it’s my turn to support you. Please check in with me when you can.”

“You know I will,” Arthur replied, smiling softly. “And thank you, Liz. Knowing that I have your support will make things much easier.”

“It’s what I should’ve done all along,” she replied with a self-deprecating laugh. “I’ll let you go now, though. You should probably hang out with the man cooking you food.” After a moment, she softly said, “I love you, Arthur.”

He blushed and smiled to himself. “I love you too, Liz. I’ll call you later tonight, okay?” Upon hanging up, he sat for a moment, thinking about how lucky he was to have a girlfriend like her. Then, collecting himself, he went back out to enjoy the dinner that Gilbert had made.


	11. Chapter 11

“Hey, I wanted to thank you again for staying tonight,” Gilbert sheepishly said as he made up his own bed for his guest to sleep in. “I mean, I know that it’s not exactly ideal, especially staying with someone that you don’t really know, but please know that it really means a lot.” He chuckled nervously. “Being alone for extended periods of time does weird shit to you, you know?”

Arthur offered the man as genuine of a smile as he could while not exactly understanding what he meant. “Yeah, I get that,” he assured, trying to make the lie sound as genuine as possible. “It must be rough, huh?”

“You have no idea, dude. Growing up is a trap, Arthur.” He sighed as he straightened out the comforter on top of the mattress. “They always say that it’ll get better when you get older, or that you’ll understand with age or whatever. That’s not true. It only gets worse. Life sucks, and then you die. I’m starting to believe that happy endings were never a thing to begin with. After all, Hollywood movies always portray things that we all want but can never have. Maybe happiness is included there as well.”

After a quick glance toward the pile of things that didn’t belong to the man he was speaking with, the blond finally spoke up. “Do you miss him?”

“Who?” Gilbert asked, eyes longingly gazing toward his ex-boyfriend’s belongings. “Roderich,” he sighed. “I miss him so much that I can hardly stand it. But I suppose that’s how all of my relationships are destined to be, you know. People date me, they have fun, we get close, but they never stay for long. Is it me? They always say that it’s not, but I’m the only common denominator that I can figure out in these scenarios.” He frowned and then shook his head as if ridding himself of the thought. “It’s whatever, you know? I need to stop moping about and just live my life as unapologetically as I did back in high school. I should go back to being the Gilbert that Al admired and looked up to. The only problem is that I don’t know where that Gilbert went.” His red pupils focused on Arthur. “Pretty stupid, huh?”

“Not really,” Arthur replied. Longing was something that he could completely understand. After all, everyone wanted something that wasn’t attainable. Then again, he didn’t think everyone was nearly as focused on mourning the unattainable as Gilbert seemed to be. It made him feel sorry for the older guy. “It’s something you want, isn’t it? How could that be stupid, Gilbert?”

“Maybe it isn’t stupid,” the man reasoned. “But even I know that it’s too late for me.” He finished making up the bed and smiled tiredly. “Here you go, Arthur. Make yourself at home. I should probably head to bed soon. I’ll make us breakfast in the morning. Let me know if you need anything, okay?”

The blond watched him go, yet something inside of him was scolding him for not reaching out to him. He knew that Gilbert was deeply hurt, emotionally, but he had never been good with comforting others. Yet part of him wanted to chase after the albino and acknowledge his pain, but what would come after that? Simply acknowledging and not being able to help would only hurt Gilbert more, wouldn’t it?

Though Natalia didn’t seem bothered by what happened between her and Alfred, Arthur had to remind himself that she was the one who did the heart breaking. In this case, Gilbert appeared to be the one who had his heart broken, and not only by Alfred. It made Arthur wonder just how much the older man would put himself through, for the sake of someone else. Who would ever want to live such a self-sacrificial life?

.

The next morning, Arthur woke up to the smell and sound of sizzling bacon in the kitchen. He laid in the bed to orientate himself, freaked out about waking up in an unfamiliar bed at first. Once he had gathered his bearings, he decided to head out toward the kitchen to find Gilbert finishing up preparing breakfast, clad in a pair of black basketball shorts, the top lining of his Calvin Klein boxers peeking over the top.

Gilbert turned to Arthur and grinned. “Good morning, Arthur! How’d you sleep?” he asked, turning off the burners of the stovetop and shoveling the bacon onto a plate. “Was the bed comfortable enough?”

“I slept well,” Arthur replied, sitting down at the small table that was set up. “Your bed was comfortable. I almost feel bad for sleeping in it while you were on the couch all night.”

The other man waved Arthur’s concerns away as if swatting at gnats. “Don’t worry about it,” he assured. “It’s really nothing. I used to have to sleep on that couch all the time. Without sounding like I’m whining, I suppose you could say I’m used to it. Pathetic, huh?”

Shaking his head, the blond smiled. “Not at all. Sometimes life is just like that.” He accepted the plate offered to him, mouth watering at the sight of the breakfast food on it. “This looks amazing, Gil!”

“It’s really nothing,” the albino replied. He then smiled fondly as he thought back to his time with Alfred. “Then again, Alfred always said that I should be a cook.” Gilbert sighed. “Maybe things would be different these days if I had chosen to attend culinary school instead of flunking out of law school.”

“Law school?” Arthur asked, taking a bite of his breakfast. His face lit up as the bite melted in his mouth. “Holy fuck!” he exclaimed after swallowing. “This is the best French toast I’ve ever had!”

Gilbert blushed. “It’s nothing, Arthur. You’re making it out to be more than what it really is.” He rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. “It’s only breakfast. There’s no reason to freak out so much. God, you remind me of Al the first time he stayed overnight and got breakfast in the morning.”

“Yeah?” the blond asked. “Tell me more about that.”

The albino chuckled to himself. “I suppose I could.”

.

Three Years Previous

Alfred blinked his eyes open and looked around, quickly reminded of the fact that he had spent the night at Gilbert’s house. He brought the comforter of Gilbert’s bed up to his nose and took a deep breath. It smelled just like the older boy, causing the blond to smile. His hands fumbled around the nightstand until he found his glasses, quickly putting them on.

For a moment, he was confused. Where was Gilbert? And then a delicious aroma enveloped him, causing him to get out of bed and follow it to the kitchen, where he found Gilbert and his younger brother Ludwig. He felt nervous around Ludwig, probably due to the boy’s stoic expression.

“Hey!” Gilbert excitedly greeted. “Good morning! Did you sleep well? Are you hungry?” He flipped a fully-cooked pancake onto a plate and slid it down the table to Ludwig, who stopped it with his hand without looking up from his newspaper and coffee. “I can make you anything you’d like! What sounds good?”

Overwhelmed for a moment by all of the questions, Alfred took stock of them in his head, ready to answer them in the order which were asked. “I slept great, and yeah, I am hungry. Do you know how to make French toast?” He sat down at the table with Ludwig, albeit as far from him as he could.

The oldest boy noticed Alfred’s discomfort and threw a dish towel at his brother. “Where are your manners, Brüder?” he demanded. “Have you realized that we have company? Say hi!”

Ludwig flicked his newspaper down and made eye contact with the freshman. “Hello, Alfred. How are you doing today? Pardon my rudeness; I wanted to be sure to read the newspaper before Feliciano got here for his tutoring session.”

Gilbert snorted. “Yeah, tutoring,” he teased. “Oh, come on! Stop lying to yourself!” he called after his brother as Ludwig stood up and left the room after a quick apology to Alfred. Red pupils rolling back, he chuckled to himself. “I made a bet with our grandfather that Ludwig will get together with Feliciano before I graduate high school. Gotta make sure I win that.”

“Ludwig is….?” Alfred asked, voice trailing off as he was unsure of how to phrase his question.

“Gay?” the other asked, laughing. “Oh, there’s no doubt in my mind about it. I mean, he is my brother, so I’d be disappointed if he wasn’t at least bi, y’know?” he joked with a wink to the freshman. “By the way, now that we’re alone.” Gilbert walked over to Alfred and pressed a kiss to his lips. “Good morning, Al.”

The bespectacled boy blushed deeply. “Good morning, Gil.” He watched as Gilbert went to the fridge and got out the ingredients for French toast. His eyes fixed on him as he watched the older boy prepare his breakfast. Gilbert was so mesmerizing to him; he couldn’t look away.

Once finished preparing the French toast, he slid the plate down to Alfred before filling a glass with milk and placing it in front of the other boy. “I can’t wait to watch you take your first bite,” he said, resting his head on his hand and smiling to himself. “You’re going to love it, Al. I just know it.”

“You think so?” the blond jokingly asked as he cut off a small piece. He took his bite and his eyes lit up. “This is incredible, Gil! Does all of your food taste like this? Like, I’ve never had anything like it! Please tell me your secrets!”

Flattered, Gilbert grinned. “Yeah, I know I’m awesome. Praise me more!”

“Have you considered being a chef, Gil? Like, I know your grandfather wants you to go to law school and all, but wouldn’t you rather go somewhere where you can thrive?” Alfred had a far off look in his eyes as he continued eating and musing aloud. “I feel like this could be really good for you. My Auntie Alice used to run a bakery before me and Arthur were born, and your food is better than hers! Please keep in my mind that my Auntie Alice always made the best food, in my opinion.”

“Then I’ll accept that compliment,” Gilbert replied, smiling at the other boy. His heart felt as if it were soaring in his chest, and before he knew it, he was kissing the other boy again, the French toast quickly forgotten.

.

Present Day

“You know,” Gilbert began, chuckling to himself, “even when I was trying to be romantic, it appeared you were the only person he thought about. At the time, I couldn’t help but feel jealous, yet now as I sit here with you, I can see the appeal.” Realizing what he was saying, his eyes widened in panic. “I-I didn’t mean--”

Arthur chuckled into his milk before setting it down. “Don’t worry about it, Gil. There’s no harm done. But please, if you would, I would absolutely love to know your secret.”

Gilbert laughed. “If Al never got it, don’t think you will either,” he replied with a wink. “It’s a secret recipe only to be known by the most awesome of people, so I’m afraid I can’t share it.”

“Pity,” Arthur replied, grinning. “Do you mind if we continue after I shower?”

“No problem. Allow me to show you where everything is.”


	12. Chapter 12

Once clean and dried off, Arthur sat back down on Gilbert’s couch, ready to hear more. One question had been digging at his brain for too long for him to hold back from asking it any longer. “Did you and Alfred ever date?” he blurted out, realizing that it sounded more accusatory than anything once the words left his lips.

Gilbert chuckled to himself. “You really waste no time, do you?” he teased, smiling. “But I’ll answer your question. Yes, we dated. But Alfred was special to me. We never did anything beyond kissing when we dated because he just seemed too pure, I guess.” He shrugged. “I know that I could’ve easily slept with him if I really wanted to, but something about his innocence was too sacred for me to try. He was a diamond in the rough, and I’d be damned if I sullied him with myself.”

“Do you really dislike yourself that much?” the blond slowly asked. “All you do is bag on yourself. Have you always been like this? I recall you being quite confident in the story you’re telling me. What ever happened to that Gil?”

Red pupils focused on the floor, the other man sighed. “He never existed. I just talked big, and I think Alfred knew that.” He took a deep breath. “That’s why I broke up with him a month after we started dating.” Gilbert chuckled self-deprecatingly, his smile more one of pain than laughter. “You were all he talked about, Arthur. How could I ever compare to someone so great?”

“It appears I’ve only caused misery or trouble in the lives of Alfred’s friends,” Arthur sighed, feeling dejected. “It must be painful for you to be talking to me. I hate that it’s come to this. Why would Alfred make you do this? Doesn’t he care that it may be hurting all of you to tell me these things?” He frowned. “You all think so highly of him, but he doesn’t sound like he’s that great of a friend to you if you have to do these things.”

“I don’t think it’s so much as him being a bad friend to us,” the other slowly replied, thinking it over. “If you ask me, I think he wants to see what kind of person you’ve become, you know? Like, if you listen to all of us and make your way to him, he’ll know he was always right about you.”

“While that may be true, what about the people who have to relive painful memories? It’s obviously so hard for you to talk to me about all of this. And I don’t want to hear some bullshit like, ‘If it’s for Alfred, it’s okay,’ because it’s not! It’s not okay, Gilbert! Him asking all of you to do this is selfish and cruel! Why can’t any of you see that? If he wants to tell me something, I’d rather he face me like a man and tell me himself instead of torturing those who loved him. I don’t care what you all think of him; he sounds like he’s become a jerk.”

Gilbert frowned sadly. “I don’t know his true intentions either, Arthur,” he admitted. “I’m just doing what was asked of me. You know, I’ve been expecting you for awhile now, but now that you’re actually here it’s hard for me to remember everything. It’s almost like a form of stage fright. Originally, I was going to be harsh and brutal about it after hearing about the falling out between you two, but now I’m not so sure about anything. You seem like a nice guy, and I almost want to believe that the fallout was a misunderstanding between you two, but once things were said they couldn’t be taken back. It’s obvious that the fallout hurt both of you, but all we were ever told was Al’s side of it. And the worst part was that it wasn’t even Al himself who told us anything. It was Toris who passed it along. He’s even the one who told us Al’s plan for if you were to try to reach out. In all honesty, I haven’t spoken to Al since we broke up.”

“Wait, but he’s not even friends with Toris, is he?” Arthur asked, confused. “I thought they got in a fight over Natalia.”

“That’s not the end of the story,” the albino sighed. “Toris weaseled his way back into Al’s life, which I’m sure you’ll hear about later on. I’m only supposed to tell you what I had to do with everything. After all, it was made clear that my portion was crucial since it was Al’s ‘Gay Awakening’ or whatever.” He rolled his eyes. “Fuck Toris, man.”

“I don’t really like the sound of this Toris fellow.”

“None of us do,” Gilbert sighed. “We all wonder why Al even likes him. Then again, before I met you, I thought the same about you. But Toris is different. After all, I went to school with the little prick.” He groaned. “Enough about him. He pisses me off. I suppose that I should tell you the rest today. After all, that’s why you’re here.” His voice became quieter as he added, “And then you’ll be on your way.”

Arthur sat there in silence. What was there to say? Was this just some elaborate plan that Toris came up with? Was Toris the one keeping him from meeting up with Alfred? Or was it really Alfred pulling the strings behind Toris? It made him wonder what was the truth behind this whole wild goose chase.

“Very well,” the blond finally replied after a moment. “Please continue your story.”

.

Three Years Previous

After having put a label on the relationship between the two of them, Alfred was suddenly a bit more popular. There were even seniors he’d never even heard of who knew his name and waved to him in the hallway. He didn’t know if they were Gilbert’s friends, but he made sure to wave back in case if they were. Since they had just officially become boyfriends, he didn’t want to do anything to upset Gilbert.

“I’ve heard your name three times on my way here, Alfie Jones!” Charlotte chirped as she sat down next to him for lunch. “You’re famous now! I can’t believe you and Gil are an item now. That won’t make lunch weird, will it?”

“Of course not,” Alfred replied, smiling at her. “Don’t worry, we won’t do couple-y things and exclude you. After all, this was originally our thing.”

She smiled happily. “That makes me happy,” she quietly admitted. “It’s good to see that you’ll always be my same old Alfie Jones.” A small giggle erupted from her lips. “You’re always so kind, thinking of others. Just remember to put yourself first at times, okay? I don’t want anyone going and taking advantage of your kindness. If someone hurts you, they’ll immediately be the next ones hurting.”

Not wanting to think too far into that last part, Alfred simply nodded and began eating. His phone then vibrated in his pocket startling him. Who could be texting him during school hours? It wasn’t like his parents would, Charlotte was right next to him, and Gilbert wasn’t the type to text unless he was in class. Curious, he pulled out his phone and read the text.

From: Unknown Number  
Hey Alfred! I had an appointment with my doctor this afternoon, and my mum took me to get a cell phone afterwards! It’s Arthur, by the way! Isn’t this great, now we can text and call all the time. But I swear if you get your phone taken because of texting, you better not blame me, got it?

The blond smiled to himself, replying back that his best friend worried and griped too much. He had nearly forgotten where he was and who he was with if Charlotte hadn’t spoken up in that exact moment.

“You seem happy,” she giggled. “Did Gil text you or something?”

He nearly jumped out of his skin as his mind was sent hurtling back to the lunch table. “What?” he quickly asked on reflex before processing her question. “No, it’s not that. My best friend Arthur finally got a cell phone, so he texted me. It’s about time, too. His parents are pretty strict with him when it comes to certain things, and cell phones are one of them. They won’t even let him have his own computer. He has to use the family computer to get on the internet. Do you know how many things are blocked on that hunk of junk? Not to mention it’s a literal dinosaur and loads so slowly.”

Charlotte smiled to herself. “I’m glad Arthur got a phone then,” she replied. “It should be easier for you two to talk now, instead of using his home phone. I’m happy for you, Alfie Jones!”

“What happened with Al?” Gilbert asked, sitting down across from his boyfriend. “Is there something we need to celebrate? I can’t think of what today is. Is it a holiday? Help me out here, Charlie!”

“Oh, you mean you don’t know?” she asked, a mischievous glint in her eyes. “To think that you wouldn’t know about something so important for your boyfriend. How tragic!”

“It literally just happened in the past few minutes, Charlie,” Alfred stated, oblivious to the fact that she was teasing his boyfriend. “I wouldn’t expect him to know. It’s not like Gil is a mind reader or anything.”

“Bless you, Al,” the senior replied before casting a smirk to Charlotte. “What happened anyway? You seem a bit happier than normal.”

“Arthur got a cell phone,” the blond replied, cradling his own cell phone in his hands. “He sent me a text a couple minutes ago. Now we can talk whenever we want. It’s pretty exciting!” His smile was wide as he turned to Gilbert. “I suppose you could say it makes the distance between him and me a lot smaller.”

“Glad to hear it,” Gilbert said before taking a bite of his own lunch. He tried to repress the jealousy rising in his head. After all, Arthur was his boyfriend’s best friend, and nothing more than that. If that were truly the case, then why did he feel so jealous? Did Alfred harbor hidden feelings for Arthur? Nah. He was overthinking things like he always did. There was no way that could happen.

Alfred’s phone vibrated again, causing him to jump. His eyes lit up as he realized it was Arthur again and quickly texted back.

Gilbert observed his boyfriend from across the table as it all went down. His heart pulled a bit as he saw how genuinely happy Alfred looked. Could his insecurity-provoked thoughts be true? Was Alfred really in love with Arthur, and just didn’t know it? But then again, what if Alfred knew he loved Arthur? What did that mean for him?

.

“Can I give you a ride home from school today?” Gilbert asked his boyfriend, pulling his car keys out of his pocket. “Ludwig has to stay behind for football, so I’ll come get him later. It would be nice to spend some time with you.”

“Yeah, that sounds great!” Alfred enthused, happy that he didn’t have to ride the bus home. He pulled out his phone and shot a quick text to his mom about riding home with a friend. “I have to tell you, though, I live pretty far from school.”

“I’ve got the gas to take you,” his boyfriend replied. “My grandfather fills my tank when I need it. You’re good. Although, I will need directions since I’ve never been to your house.” He then thought about what he had said. He was going to his boyfriend’s house for the first time! What if Alfred’s parents were there? The pressure to make a good first impression weighed heavily on him.

“I’m glad I have my house key,” the blond thought aloud as they walked to Gilbert’s car together. “My dad works second shift at his job, and my mom had an appointment today.” He fished around in his backpack just to make sure he was right about his key, pulling it out with a triumphant smile once he found it.

Gilbert watched Alfred with a mix of adoration and amusement. How could one person be so cute without realizing it? Surely this boy wasn’t good for his heart, but he didn’t care. In that moment, he realized that he was a lot more crazy about Alfred than he had ever realized.

Once they were on their way in Gilbert’s black Camry, the albino began to relax, focusing on driving instead of Alfred. As long as he could maintain his focus on the road, then he was good to go. Driving was one of the things that Gilbert knew for a fact that he was good at. Nothing should be able to distract him from that.

“Don’t forget to turn left at the next corner,” Alfred reminded, unknowingly throwing his boyfriend’s focus right out the window. He smiled, content that he wasn’t stuck in some hot and sweaty school bus with a bunch of screaming kids. Sitting in the air conditioned car of his boyfriend as he headed home was a sort of bliss that he never knew could happen to him.

Upon reaching his home, the blond opened the car door and then turned back to his boyfriend. “Aren’t you going to turn the car off and come in?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. He then realized how assuming he sounded. “Oh, wait! Do you have something to do today? I’m sorry if I’ve kept you from it!”

Gilbert instantly killed the engine and ripped the key from the ignition. “I’ve got time,” he quickly replied, hoping he didn’t sound as desperate as he felt. He got out of his car and shut the door, locking it as he waited for Alfred. “Your house looks nice,” he observed as Alfred got out and joined him. 

“Wait until you see the inside,” his boyfriend laughed. “Your jaw may never come off of the floor.” He teasingly winked to Gilbert and grabbed his hand, leading him up toward the house. “I’m just messing with you. It’s the same as any other house, so it’s not really that big of a deal.”

To Gilbert, it wasn’t just any other house. This was his boyfriend’s house. It was unknown territory. What could he expect upon entering? The thought was both thrilling and terrifying at the same time. He couldn’t wait to enter the house.

The house was meticulous! Everything had a place, and the cleanliness excited Gilbert! It looked like his dream home! It was large, beautiful, clean, and organized. As he looked around during his tour of it, his eyes appeared to be sparkling. Who knew Alfred could live in such a beautiful place?

Ending the tour in the kitchen, Alfred smiled at Gilbert. “Could I make you anything? I’m always hungry after school.” He opened the fridge. “I usually have a sandwich or something.”

“No thanks,” Gilbert replied. “I’m good.” He observed the kitchen as Alfred spread some peanut butter and strawberry jam onto two slices of bread. “Peanut butter and jelly, huh?” he teased. “You didn’t strike me as the type.”

“What’s that mean?” the blond asked before taking a bite and sitting on a stool at the island counter in the middle of the kitchen. “It’s my favorite, dude.” He took another bite and smiled. “You don’t like it?”

“I never said that,” his boyfriend replied, sitting on the stool next to him. “Then again, I’ve only had it with grape jelly.”

Alfred instantly held his sandwich out to Gilbert. “Please try it! It’s best with strawberry jam!” He grinned with pride as the other boy bit into the sandwich and seemed to enjoy it. “See? Isn’t it good?” he chirped before taking another bite.

“Yeah, it’s good,” the albino agreed, happily watching Alfred finish his sandwich. “Although you look really cute when you eat things you enjoy.”

The blond blushed. “You think so?” he asked. “I never really thought about it. What makes you say that?”

“I suppose you may just be cute all the time,” Gilbert admitted, blushing. “But then again, you’re probably already aware of that.” Feeling the moment calling for it, he leaned over and kissed Alfred, his boyfriend happily kissing him back.

“I’m home, Alfie!” Amelia Jones greeted, walking into the kitchen. Her eyes widened upon seeing the boys quickly push each other away, knowing what they had been doing. She tried not to smile as she saw the embarrassed and horrified looks on their faces. “Who’s your friend?”


	13. Chapter 13

Present Day

“Wait, you mean to tell me that Aunt Mimi caught you two kissing?” Arthur laughed. “That’s hilarious!” He thought he was going to fall off of Gilbert’s couch. “I can only imagine what her face looked like when she saw it!” As he settled down, Arthur’s mouth stretched into a fond smile. “Then again, Aunt Mimi was probably just happy that Alfred had finally found someone he liked after what happened with Natalia.”

Gilbert smiled as he thought back to it. “Yeah, you’re right about that,” he confirmed. “She didn’t have any hostility toward me being a boy or anything. I think she was just more surprised than anything, you know?” For a moment, he was silent before saying, “I still talk to her. Even though I’m no longer in contact with her son, I still check in with her. Amelia was always good to me, and all of the stuff that happened with Alfred after we broke up just…” His voice trailed off as he delved into his thoughts. “I can’t leave her alone.”

The blond was quiet for awhile before leaning toward Gilbert. “What are you talking about? Did something happen?”

Unsure of how to answer, Gilbert sighed. “It’s all really complicated, and it’s not my place to talk about it. I’m sure you’ll hear it from someone else who was around during it, but I’m not supposed to say anything.” He bit his lip with worry. “D-Do you think you could give her a call every now and then? She misses you. That much I know for sure.”

Arthur was stunned. “Yeah, I can do that.”

“Thanks, man. Anyway, on with the story.”

.

Three Years Previous

“So, are you two dating?” Amelia asked, setting her purse down on the counter. She leaned on the countertop, propping her head up on her hand. Her blue eyes focused on Gilbert as they lit up. “My Alfie never tells me anything, you know,” she whined. “So what’s your name?”

Gilbert could feel the sweat on his brow as he stared at her, horrified. “U-Um, my name is G-Gilbert Beilschmidt,” he stammered out, trying not to let his nerves get the best of him. “I-It’s nice t-to meet you, M-Mrs. Jones.”

She turned to her son and smiled. “He’s adorable! I like him!” she claimed, beaming with pride. “You’ve chosen a good guy, Alfie! It seems you take after me in that aspect, don’t you?”

“Mom, stop,” Alfred groaned, throwing his head back. “Leave him alone. Can’t you tell you’re making him uncomfortable?”

“But that’s what moms are supposed to do, Alfie,” she huffed in response. “You should be thanking me for holding back. Remember that time with Arthur when I--”

To Gilbert’s surprise, Alfred looked upset at the mention of the name “Arthur, cutting off his mother with a sharp, “Yes! I remember, Mom, okay? Please go somewhere else. You’re bugging us.”

Amelia then turned to Gilbert. “Isn’t my son just the worst at times?” she whined to the older boy. “What’s this boy’s problem? I just want to be his friend.”

“You’re not my friend, you’re my mom!” her son replied. “Now please go. If you don’t, then we will.” As Amelia fixed him with a levelled stare, Alfred rolled his eyes and pulled on Gilbert’s sleeve. “Come on, Gilbert. Let’s go to my room. At least there’s a lock on my door so somebody,” he glared over at his mother, “can leave us alone.”

“You’re not fun, Alfie.”

Gilbert nervously stood up. “It was nice meeting you, Mrs. Jones,” he quickly said, smiling to her before heading off with Alfred.

“He’s a good kid, Alfie! I like him!” Amelia called after them, ignoring her son’s loud groan of aggravation in response.

.

“Your mom’s pretty cool, you know,” Gilbert commented as Alfred walked him out to his car that evening. “Way better than mine.” He laughed and grabbed Alfred’s hand and caressed the other boy’s cheek with the other. “Thanks for inviting me in today. I had a lot of fun with you.”

Alfred blushed. “Mom tries too hard to be my friend sometimes,” he admitted, embarrassed. “But she seems to like you, so I can guarantee you that you’ll be invited over more often and all that. She already does that to Charlie. Hope you don’t mind.”

The older boy smirked. “Of course not,” he assured. “Any time I get to spend with you is good for me. You should know that by now.” He leaned down and pressed a kiss to Alfred’s cheek. “I should probably get going now. I bet my grandpa is wondering where I am. I’ll see you tomorrow at school, okay?”

The blond grabbed Gilbert’s arm as he turned to get into his car. “Wait,” he quickly said. Before he could overthink his actions, Alfred pulled Gilbert’s lips down to his for a brief moment. His cheeks were burning from his boldness, but it was something he felt he needed to do. He smiled at the albino as they pulled apart. “Now you can go.”

For a moment, Gilbert just stood there, blinking in shock, before we swept Alfred into his arms, holding him close. His lips crashed into the other boy’s, smiles forming on each of their faces. He slowly deepened the kiss, both boys getting lost in their feelings for each other.

And just for that moment, Alfred felt as if everything was perfect.

.

That night as Alfred sat in his room, he looked over his texting conversation with Arthur, smiling to himself. Now that Arthur had a phone, he felt a lot closer to his best friend. They could text or call each other whenever they wanted now. Maybe it would make the distance seem a lot smaller. Either way, he was happy that his best friend was easier to contact now. 

His thumbs itched to text Arthur and tell him about Gilbert, but something was holding him back. What would Arthur think if he told him that he liked men? Would it change anything? What if Arthur thought it was gross? Would it harm their friendship.

After a moment, he put his phone down and watched as the screen shut off from inactivity. Was there any way he could get rid of this anxiety? Why was he so worried about Arthur hating him for something like this? They were best friends. There should be nothing wrong with him telling his best friend that he had a boyfriend, yet something still seemed really off. If Alfred were to tell Arthur, what if he took it the wrong way and assumed Alfred was in love with him. That would be too much.

His mind then went to his mother and he jumped up from his bed and ran out to the living room, where his mother was reading a book on the couch. Unable to slow down his anxious momentum, he nearly tackled her on the couch as his breathing came out in ragged gasps.

Amelia pushed her son off of her and stared at him, concerned, for a few moments. Her slender hand pushed back his bangs as she checked him for a fever. Seeing that he didn’t, she frowned in concern. “Alfie, are you okay? You seem upset. What’s wrong?”

“Don’t tell Auntie Alice about Gilbert,” he gasped out. “Please just don’t. I don’t want it getting to Arthur before I can tell him myself, okay?” His face fell as he thought about how hard it was going to be to tell his best friend that he had a boyfriend. “I just….I need some time first, Mom. Who knows if Gil and I will last, you know?” he lied. “I don’t want it to be like another Natalia situation.” Her name left a bitter taste in his mouth, but he tried to ignore it. “I just….”

“Are you worried that Arthur will think of you differently if you have a boyfriend instead of a girlfriend?” she asked, leaving her son dumbfounded. She sighed, seeing from his facial expression that she was right. “Honey, I don’t think Arthur would change his opinion of you over something so silly. You two are womb-to-tomb friends. He will understand whenever you decide to tell him. Try not to think too hard about it, okay?” Amelia reached over and ruffled her son’s hair. “Something like that won’t ever come in between you two.”

“Thanks Mom,” he replied before getting up. “I think I’m going to head to bed. I’m pretty tired today. Goodnight.”

He headed back to his room after kissing her cheek and laid in his bed. Was his mother right? Would Arthur really not care if he liked men? How could she be so sure? Was there any way to find out how Arthur felt about that before actually telling him?

With all of those questions swimming in his head, he forced himself to sleep.

.

Present Day

“I remember Al being nervous about telling you about our relationship,” Gilbert said, looking up at Arthur on the couch. “He was so scared that you wouldn’t want to be friends with him anymore if you knew.” He studied the blond’s expression for a moment. “But the thing is, you know that I’m openly gay and even stayed overnight in my apartment on the day you met me. You don’t have a single thing against gay people.” His expression changed as he frowned with shame. “And to think, all this time….All this time, I thought you and Al had the falling out because you found out he was gay. That wasn’t the case, was it?”

Arthur was at a loss for words. “Of course not,” he softly said. “Our falling out was my fault. It wasn’t because of him or his sexuality or the friends he had. It was all me…” His voice trailed off as he stared down at his hands, which were clasped in his lap.

“Do you think you could tell me your side of things once I’m finished with what I’m supposed to tell you?” the other man asked. “There will always be two sides to every story, and I’ve heard Al’s side. But something tells me that the intentions on your side don’t match up to what he felt they were. Call it a hunch, but I think that if certain things were never said and taken to heart, it would be you helping him out right now. Not Toris.”

“You really think so?” The blond’s voice was choked as he looked up at Gilbert with tears in his eyes. His heart felt so heavy from what Gilbert told him he had originally thought of him. “I just wish there was something I could have done, a way to take back what I said. If I could just go back in time and relive that day again, maybe things could be different. Maybe we wouldn’t have hurt each other.”

“Hey, don’t do that,” Gilbert said, kneeling in front of Arthur and grabbing his hand to comfort him. “Getting caught in thoughts like those can’t be any good.” He frowned, seeing that the other boy still seemed lost in a downward spiral of his own thoughts. “Arthur, snap out of it!” he commanded, causing the blond to jump and look up at him with tear-filled eyes. “It wasn’t completely your fault. Al should’ve trusted his best friend more than he did. Seeing you right here, right now, I can see that you really do care about him. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t have come here. Arthur, you’re not a horrible person, like we were made to believe. You’re just a person, like the rest of us.”

Arthur wiped his eyes. “How could I have been so ignorant at the time? He was hurting so badly, and I did nothing to help him. After our falling out, I didn’t reach out to him because I thought he’d talk to me whenever he was ready. How could I be so stupid to assume something like that, Gilbert?”

The other man stroked the back of Arthur’s hand with his thumb. “Don’t beat yourself up over the past. It never helps anyone. Trust me, I’d know.” He sighed as a tear rolled down the blond’s cheek, reaching up to wipe it off. Realizing far too late what he had done, he looked up at Arthur, both of them staring at each other, wide-eyed. “I’m sorry,” he said, quickly letting go of Arthur’s hand and scurrying back to his chair. “I overstepped your boundaries. It won’t happen again.”

Feeling his heart pull, the green-eyed boy looked back down into his lap, where he folded his hands. Yet for some reason, he couldn’t dismiss the feeling of Gilbert’s hand holding his. “It’s nothing, Gilbert. Don’t worry about it. You didn’t do anything wrong. Anyway, let’s get back to the story. I’m sure you have better things to do.”


	14. Chapter 14

Three Years Previous

Alfred had been dating Gilbert for two months before it finally came out to the rest of their high school. He was certain his heart would stop as people glanced up at him whenever he walked by. Boys in the locker room would turn away from him whenever it came time to change, up until he took initiative by going and changing in one of the toilet stalls instead, shocked that the stalls actually had doors.

It wasn’t as if he were being bullied, but he couldn’t help but notice that people looked at and treated him differently. And it wasn’t that they were treating him badly, it was more like they had all gone back to being strangers again. He was at least thankful that Charlotte treated him the same as she always had, yet sometimes he would even catch Toris looking his way, but he could never understand the other boy’s expression.

Gilbert was always so patient with his boyfriend, making sure to do everything he could to ease his anxieties, even if it meant letting go of his hand when they went certain places. He knew far too well the feeling of coming out of the closet and the unwanted spotlight that came with it. But Alfred had said that he wanted to bring it out to the open, so he wanted to accommodate him in any way he could. It was the least he could do for the man who made him smile the most. Everyone who didn’t approve of them could go straight to Hell, as far as he was concerned. Alfred deserved the best, and he was going to try his best to give it to him.

“When will the gossip die down?” Charlotte groaned, taking her usual seat at the lunch table next to Alfred. “What’s so strange about two guys dating? Honestly, as long as my sweet Alfie Jones is happy, then I am too.” She shrugged indifferently and reached over to ruffle her best friend’s hair. “Are you happy, Alfie Jones?” she asked him, a wide smile on her face.

Alfred looked across the table at Gilbert and blushed. “Yeah,” he quietly answered, tapping his boyfriend’s shoe with his own under the table. He looked down at his foot the moment Gilbert’s face turned a deep shade of crimson. There was no way he would ever be able to get over the way he blushed. His face would turn a shade of red that would rival his pupils, and Alfred couldn’t help but marvel over how cute it was.

“That’s what we like to hear, right, Gil?” Charlotte chirped to the senior across from her.

“Y-You bet, Charlie,” he said, averting his eyes from the freshmen. Something about Alfred’s innocence always made him look away whenever his boyfriend did. It drove him nuts, but he couldn’t tell if it was in a good or bad way.

While it was true that Gilbert Beilschmidt was, by no means, a virgin, it was almost painfully obvious that Alfred was. Not only that, but Alfred had just recently taken an interest in men. His innocence was almost torture for someone like Gilbert, who had people constantly wanting to hook up with him at parties. He’d always turn them down, of course, but sometimes he wished he could just relieve some steam with someone, knowing that he couldn’t dare ask Alfred about something like that until it was brought up by the boy himself. Yet even though being with him brought up so much pent up sexual frustration, Gilbert couldn’t imagine being with anyone other than Alfred.

“Shit, I forgot to grab a milk,” she groaned, standing up from the table. “I’ll be back. Do either of you need anything?”

“I’m good,” both boys replied in unison before looking up at each other and smiling as she walked away.

“Do you have any weekend plans?” Alfred asked Gilbert, smiling across the table at him as he adjusted his glasses. “I know you usually go to parties and such.”

Gilbert didn’t exactly know how to take that. He knew that Alfred said he didn’t mind his partying habits, but was his boyfriend not concerned at all about the types of things that happened at parties? “Yeah, I’m going to one tonight,” he told him. “What about you? Do you have any plans, Al?”

“Charlie’s staying over tonight, but nothing else that I can really think of,” the blond replied. “My life seems kinda boring compared to yours, huh?” He let out a short self-deprecating laugh.

“Who called you boring?” his boyfriend asked, clenching his hands into fists. “There’s nothing boring about you.”

“I didn’t say anyone called me boring, Gil,” Alfred replied, looking troubled. “Are you okay? You seem a bit on edge lately. Is something wrong?” He frowned at his boyfriend out of concern. “Are you getting enough sleep?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Gilbert replied, shoving some gum into his mouth. He had decided to give up smoking for Alfred, but it was a lot harder than he thought it would be. Some days he was more irritable than others, but with how distracted he was from his lack of sexual contact, he felt as if he were a ticking timebomb. “Sorry, I didn’t sleep well last night,” he lied, hoping that his boyfriend would just drop the topic.

“I hope you get better sleep over the weekend,” the other simply replied, offering Gilbert a kind smile.

Something about that reply annoyed Gilbert, but he couldn’t think of what it was. He decided not to say anything in reply to it and instead announced that he was finished with his lunch before leaving. What was wrong with him? Why was he behaving this way toward Alfred, who hadn’t done him any wrong? It wasn’t that he was bored with their relationship, yet at the same time that was also the exact problem.

.

Alfred sat next to Charlotte on his couch, staring blankly at the movie playing on his TV. He just couldn’t seem to focus, a feeling in his gut telling him that someone bad was coming. It wasn’t like he wanted to focus on his impending feeling of doom, but it was hard to turn his attention to much else, even with his best friend present.

Charlotte leaned against Alfred, scrolling through social media apps on her cell phone, not really paying attention to the movie either. She sensed that there was something off about her best friend, but she didn’t really know how to bring up such a topic. It wasn’t like she could casually be like, “Hey, Alfie Jones, something seems to be bothering you. Do you want to talk about it?” Then again, she could do that, but it would seem off somehow.

Her scrolling stopped as she came to a certain picture on her feed that made her heart sink. It wasn’t exactly the topic of the picture that made her feel sick, but more so something that she saw in the background. She clicked on it and zoomed in just to make sure, her stomach dropping upon confirmation. The picture was taken at the party Gilbert had talked about, and in the background, he was pictured making out with a random guy there. It made Charlotte angrier than she could ever express. She wondered if Alfred had seen it yet, but she was also scared to show him in case he hadn’t. But wouldn’t it be better to hear from a friend?

“What are you looking at, Charlie?” Alfred asked, peeking over her shoulder. His entire body went stiff upon seeing the zoomed-in image pulled up on her phone. He felt as if he were going to vomit. Everything hurt, starting from his heart to his head. “G-Give me a minute.”

He stood up and stumbled to his bedroom, pulling his phone out of his pocket. Checking the time, he realized that it was probably the middle of the night where Arthur was, but he didn’t care at that moment. His finger automatically pressed the call button next to Arthur’s cell phone number before bringing it to his ear.

“Mmmh…” Arthur’s sleepy voice yawned. “Alfred, is that you?” He had definitely just been woken up by the call, and Alfred began to feel bad about it. “Hello? Alfred? Is everything okay?”

“I-It’s not,” the other boy slowly said, cradling his phone to his ear almost as if it were a way to hug the person on the other end. “I’m devastated, Arthur. I’m hurt. I don’t know what to do. Relationships are scary, and I don’t like them anymore.”

Arthur suddenly sounded wide awake as he spoke again. “Alfred, what happened? Do you want to talk about it? What can I do to help you?”

“There’s so much I haven’t told you,” Alfred sobbed, tears streaming down his cheeks. “I’m such a bad friend for keeping it from you, but I can’t keep hiding it. You don’t deserve that. The truth is, I have a boyfriend. Or maybe had...I’m not sure anymore. Anyway, I have been dating a guy for the past couple months, and I never told you because I was scared of what you would say.”

“What I would say?” the other boy asked, sounding confused. “Why should it matter who you date, Alfred? Your preference and partners are none of my business unless they treat you badly. That’s when it becomes my business.” There was almost a hint of a smile in his voice as he said, “And to me, it sounds like it’s about to become my business. Alfred, what did he do? Are you okay?”

Relieved at his best friend’s words, Alfred began to catch Arthur up on the past couple months of his life. He told Arthur about how Gilbert had comforted him when Natalia moved away, and how he had kissed him for the first time at a school football game. Though there wasn’t too much to say about their relationship, Alfred found himself baring it all to his best friend, who listened patiently and added feedback here and there.

“But tonight, Charlie was scrolling on someone’s profile, and there was a picture from the party he’s at tonight,” the bespectacled boy relayed, throat growing tight upon remembering the picture. “And she zoomed in a bit to make sure that what she saw was legit.” He took a deep breath. “Gilbert was making out with some guy in the background. I feel sick, Arthur. What do I do?”

“Unfortunately, you don’t seem to have many options in this case.” Arthur sighed before continuing. “From what you’ve said about the photo from the party, it makes me wonder if he’s been doing this all along. Alfred, if he’s going to do these kinds of things behind your back, then is he really worth being with anyway?”

.

Present Day

“The next day, Al broke up with me,” Gilbert sighed. He looked up at Arthur, patience in his eyes. “And I know I deserved it. Though if I could take back that night, then I wouldn’t have gotten mixed up with Roderich, and maybe Al and I could’ve worked things out better. But as you know, it is what it is.” His shoulders lifted in an indifferent shrug. “You were a good friend to him, Arthur, and you were right about me. I don’t blame you for what happened between me and Al. I never did.”

“You say that now,” the blond sighed, “but if that were true then you wouldn’t still be hung up over him, you know.”

“My hang-ups are for personal reasons,” the older man sighed. “I mean, if you hurt someone as precious as Al, would you be okay with it?” His eyes suddenly widened in realization. “Shit, I did not think that through before saying it out loud. I’m really sorry, Arthur.”

“I wouldn’t,” Arthur answered honestly, looking up at Gilbert. “And I’m not. Alfred was a dear friend to me, and he was always there for me and in my corner no matter what happened. I hurt him, Gilbert, and I need to atone for that. That’s why I’m looking for him. I’m determined to make things right because as the most loyal friend I ever had, that’s what he truly deserves.”

Gilbert nodded sagely. “It is, isn’t it?” he asked, biting his lip as he thought. “Well, I suppose this is where we part ways, Arthur. Thanks for hearing me out. I hope that I was able to help you at least a little, and I’m sorry that you had to know the truth about that. I’ve become a better person these days, but it’s not like you have to believe that.”

“I believe it,” the other responded, looking Gilbert in the eye. “Would you be opposed to keeping in contact? Something tells me that you need a friend, especially with what you’ve got going on.” His emerald eyes glanced over toward the things that belonged to Roderich. “I have a lot of driving ahead of me, which means a lot of time to talk if you need it.”

“Thanks, Arthur. I’d like that.” He passed his phone to the blond, unlocked and on the contacts screen. “You know, you’re completely different from what I had imagined you to be. Before I forget,” he said, standing up. Gilbert walked into the kitchen and began to write something down on a sticky note before coming back with it and handing it to Arthur. “I’ve thought about it, and I think you’re awesome enough to know my recipe.”

Emerald eyes gazing down at the neatly-written recipe for French toast, Arthur felt his lips pull into a grateful smile. “Thank you, Gilbert. It means a lot.”


	15. Chapter 15

Arthur sighed, looking down at the name and address Gilbert had given him. Kiku Honda. He wondered what sorts of things he would learn there, and also pondered the temperament of the owner of the name. As he plugged the address into his GPS, Arthur whispered a quick prayer that Kiku would be friendly toward him. 

He groaned in agony upon finding out that Kiku’s apartment was a five-hour drive from where he was. Sure, he enjoyed driving, but being on the road more often than not was starting to get old. Couldn’t Alfred’s friends live closer to each other? What was up with this wild goose chase anyway? It made him wonder what Alfred was trying to say by making him do all of this. Was Alfred trying to test his patience to see if he would follow instructions precisely? If anything, he was definitely testing his estranged friend’s patience, that was for sure.

Grumbling under his breath, Arthur backed out of his parking space. With a small smile up toward Gilbert’s apartment, he pulled out of the parking lot and began the next leg of his adventure.

.

Alfred groaned as he laid in bed and stared out the window. He had been left alone in the room after Toris had excused himself for a phone call. His mind crawled back to the peaceful days he had spent with Arthur back in junior high. Was it so wrong of him to want them back? Sometimes even he asked himself why he had to set up such an obstacle course for Arthur to return to his side. Would it truly be worth it? What if Arthur gave up halfway through? What would he do then?

“Sorry about that,” Toris stated, coming back into the room. He sat down in a chair beside Alfred’s bed and smiled. “I got some good news for you. That phone call was from Gilbert. Arthur just left his apartment and is on his way to Kiku’s.”

The blond felt his lips pull into a delighted smile as he turned his head to look at his friend. “That’s great news!” he chirped. “That means he’s one step closer to coming here.” He closed his eyes and tried to imagine how things would go once Arthur arrived. In his mind, it would be as if nothing had ever happened between them.

Toris watched Alfred daydream, fighting back the harsh feelings of jealousy that stabbed into his heart. Why would he never be good enough? When Gilbert had told him only minutes ago that they were wrong about the type of person Arthur was, he almost hung up right then and there. Natalia had previously said the same thing. He refused to believe it. If Arthur wasn’t a heartless person, then why was Alfred so agonized? There wasn’t a proper explanation, so he decided to cling to the man he had never met being the villain.

“I’m so excited to see him again,” Alfred sighed, a hopeful and innocent smile traced onto his face. “It’s been so long. You’ll like him, Toris. I know you will!”

“I’m sure I will,” the other agreed, fighting back the urge to retch at such a suggestion. He had to be happy for Alfred, at least on the outside. After all, how much longer would the blond’s happiness truly last?

.

“Are you going to talk to me today?” Elizaveta asked once Arthur answered the phone and plugged it into his hands-free device. “Because you’ve been oh so terribly busy lately.” He could practically hear her rolling her eyes. “How’s the search going? Did you find out anything?”

“Not yet,” he sighed, passing a car on the highway. “I’m hoping to find out something at this next place. It’s a name I’ve never heard before.”

“Just give it up, Arthur,” his girlfriend sighed. “Come back home. This whole thing is just ridiculous, and who’s to say it’ll even be worth it in the long run? I think you’re just wasting your summer doing this when there are better things you could be doing.”

“What, like hanging out with you and your obnoxious friends?” he bitterly replied. “This is better than that by a long shot.”

“Look, I know you don’t like my friends all that much, but you don’t have to be saying things like that,” she defended. “What’s gotten into you? Something’s different about you. You’ve changed ever since you left, and you haven’t even been gone very long!” Elizaveta groaned in frustration. “Like, am I really talking to Arthur right now?”

“If all you’re going to do is bitch at me, then I’m hanging up,” Arthur told her, trying to avoid glaring at the road in annoyance.

“See? That! That’s what I’m talking about, Arthur! Where is that even coming from? My Arthur would never say something like that to me!” Elizaveta raged. “It’s like you don’t even see yourself changing! It’s scary!”

“I’ll talk to you later, Liz,” he said before pressing the button to hang up. Arthur breathed a sigh of relief once he heard the click of the hang up. If he was lucky, she wouldn’t call back.

Was she really right, though? Had he changed in the past few days? If he had, it was because he was focused on his “mission”. Nothing more than that. It was nothing to worry about. It wasn’t like he was developing some new personality or something. Why worry about something she probably thought up? She was only saying those things to scare him into coming back home, and there was no way he was going to do that without getting some answers from Alfred. Though he didn’t know how much longer it was going to take, he refused to give up part-way through.

.

A few hours later, Arthur pulled up outside of a small house in a big city. According to the address that Gilbert gave him, this was Kiku Honda’s house. It made him smile to know that this person seemed well off financially. There weren’t many around their age who were. Arthur put his car in park and sat for a moment to collect himself before finally getting out and walking up to the front door. His hand hesitated for a moment before ringing the doorbell.

A tall man with curly, dark hair answered the door, stifling a yawn. He had a small kitten perched comfortably on his shoulder. His green eyes blinked lazily at Arthur before he slowly turned his head to the blond’s blind spot behind the door. “I believe this is the person you were expecting,” he drawled in a quiet voice, as if speaking any louder or faster would exhaust him.

“Thank you,” a much smaller man said, switching places with the man who had answered the door. He had ink black hair and kind, dark eyes. “You must be Arthur. I’m Kiku. I am pleased to meet you. Please come in.”

Arthur stepped into the house, removing his shoes and placing them next to the door with the others. He marveled at how beautiful and clean Kiku’s home was. The only house that he felt could rival it was Alfred’s. Perhaps Kiku was also an ex of Alfred’s? It would make sense. Either way, the apartment was impeccable, and Arthur mentally gave props to its inhabitants.

“This is a beautiful home you have here, Kiku,” he complimented as the other man led him into the living room. His eyes widened as he saw five cats lazily lying about the living room. “And some nice cats.”

“You aren’t allergic, are you?” Kiku asked, picking up a cat to sit on the sofa where it had been lying. He placed the cat on his lap and began stroking it as it snuggled into him. “I would feel horrible if I were to find out that you were.”

“Oh, no worries at all!” Arthur quickly assured. “I actually like cats, so I would be sad if I were allergic. You’re good!” He felt relief when Kiku smiled kindly at him. “Don’t worry, your cats won’t bother me at all.”

“That’s good to know,” the Japanese man answered with a nod. “I suppose we should get to what you came for, shouldn’t we?” He made himself comfortable, scratching his cat behind its ears as Arthur got comfortable as well. “You see, I met Alfred Jones about six months after things went down with Gilbert. Charlie had convinced him to go to a party that I happened to be at that night. You know, come to think of it, that may have been the only party I ever went to in college.” Kiku shrugged indifferently after taking in that knowledge. “I suppose that doesn’t matter, does it? Anyway, he and I didn’t meet in the most romantic of ways, but there was just something about him that I couldn’t bring myself to forget.”

.

Two Years Previous

“Charlie, I’m still not sure about this,” Alfred sighed from the back seat of his best friend’s brother’s car. He felt sick at the idea of going to a college party, but after being assured there was no way Gilbert would be there, he had calmed down. “What if they find out that we’re only in high school?”

“No one’s going to find out if you keep your mouth shut,” Tim Schmit sighed, rolling his eyes. “Look, kid, it’s going to be fine. If anything starts to go wrong, I want one or both of you to come and find me, got it? You’re going to be fine. I’ll keep you safe. Besides, your mom and dad won’t find out since you’re supposed to be with us tonight anyway.”

Charlotte reached into the back seat from her spot in the passenger’s seat and held his hand in hers. “Don’t worry, Alfie Jones. I have no plans of leaving your side.”

He cracked a small smile at her. “You better not,” he teased. “Otherwise I might end up having the worst night of my life.”

Little did he know what was in store at the party.


	16. Chapter 16

Alfred awkwardly stood in the corner of a living room where the bassline of the music blasted from nearby speakers coursed through his body. Feeling as if he had become one with the intrusive bass waves, he nursed at his soda Charlotte had poured him. Though she had only left his side to use the bathroom real quick, he couldn’t help but feel betrayed. His negative feelings coursed through him like the bassline, only boosting his discomfort. He wanted to be anywhere but there.

His eyes wandered around the room, resting on a guy who looked equally as uncomfortable, his ink black hair blowing around from the breeze of the ceiling fan, dark eyes searching for an escape route. Intrigued, Alfred cautiously followed him as he wandered through the house and to the back porch. Fewer people were outside, filling the blond with relief as he took a deep breath of the fresh night air.

“Is there a reason you followed me out here?” the guy asked him in a soft voice, turning around. His facial features betrayed his actual age, making him seem both old and young at the same time. Such an interesting face was something Alfred was sure he’d remember. “You were looking about as uncomfortable as I was. I’m guessing that parties aren’t your scene either. Let me guess, you were dragged here by a friend to get over a breakup?”

Blue eyes wide, the teenager gawked at the Asian man before him. “How did you know? It’s like you’re in my head or something!”

“You know what they say, ‘we smell our own’. I’m here for the same reason, only my friend ditched me and is probably at some STD-infested hotel by now.” He sighed and sat on the porch swing, staring up at the sky. “You’re welcome to sit with me. It’s much quieter out here. My name is Kiku, by the way. What’s yours?”

Taking Kiku up on his offer, the blond sat down beside him, keeping a respectable amount of distance between them. “I’m Alfred Jones. Don’t mind me asking this, but how old are you? I can’t really tell, but something says you’re not in high school.”

“I’m a sophomore at the university down the street,” Kiku replied, turning his attention to Alfred. “I’ll be twenty in a few months.” His brow furrowed a bit as he examined his companion’s face. “You look fairly young. I’m going to guess that you’re a freshman in high school, somewhere around fifteen?”

Alfred’s jaw dropped. “Dude, that’s so cool! You’re really good at this!” He set his soda down on the porch floor next to the swing. “So you’re in college? What are you studying?”

The Asian man looked back up to the sky, forlornly. “I haven’t completely figured that one out. My father wants me to be a doctor. My mother wants me to be a lawyer. It’s a struggle to choose between which of my parents to please.”

“What about what you want to be?”

Kiku’s attention snapped back to Alfred as he stared at him, eyes wide. Though it was such an innocent question, he couldn’t fathom going to school on his family’s money for something that he wanted other than what they wanted. “Ever since I was a child, I wanted to be a veterinarian,” he admitted, “but I doubt either of my parents would accept something like that as a career choice for me.”

“Why not? It’s close enough to a doctor, isn’t it?” The blond shrugged his shoulders in a carefree manner, smiling at his companion. “When it comes to saving lives, what does it matter what species they are? No matter what, you’d feel good about yourself at the end of the day. Don’t you think having a job that makes you feel that way is what matters in the long run? I mean, why do something that you’re not passionate about?”

His hands folded carefully in his lap, Kiku stared down at the wooden flooring of the porch. “Do you really think it’s possible to stray from the predetermined path set out for you by your parents?” he finally asked after what felt like an eternity of silence. “It scares me to try. What if they cut my funding for school? It’s not like I could pay tuition on my own.”

“The thing about life is that it’s always a mystery,” Alfred replied, a dreamy look in his eyes as he gazed up at the stars. “You never know what’s going to happen the next moment. I suppose you could say that every decision you make is a gamble. For every action, there’s a reaction, right? Who is to say which path is the correct one unless you go for the one you choose? If you want to be a vet, then I’d say go for it. The only things stopping you is yourself right now.”

The Japanese man weighed the blond’s words in his mind. Was something like that really so easy? Could he really just choose his own fate like that? “Do you really think I can do it?” Though Kiku was never one for the opinions of strangers, he felt as if Alfred’s would be important. After all, this kid had already caused him to think harder than he ever thought he would at some random house party.

“Why would it matter what I think?” Alfred laughed. “If anything, isn’t it up to you in the end?”

“Alfie Jones, there you are!” Charlotte stormed out of the house and up to them, crossing her arms over her chest. “I leave your side for one second and you pull a friggin’ disappearing act on me?! Who do you think you are?! You had me so worried!”

“Sorry about that, Charlie,” he apologized, looking as sympathetic as he could. “I just really needed some air and then got caught up in conversation.” With bright eyes, he gestured to the man next to him. “This is Kiku! He goes to the university down the road! We’re talking about college degrees!”

She looked down at Kiku, anger quickly dissipating. “Nice to meet you, Kiku. I’m Charlie.” Charlotte moved to perch herself on Alfred’s knee as she continued speaking. “What are you planning on going to school for?”

Seeing Kiku’s shy expression, Alfred spoke up for him. “He’s debating whether to be a veterinarian or a lawyer or doctor like his parents want him to be.”

Charlotte clicked her tongue in dismay. “That has to be a rough decision. Don’t we all want to please our parents? But it also leaves you wondering what could have been if you had followed your dream of what you truly wanted to be. I can see how you’re debating it. It’s a very difficult decision to make in the end.”

Kiku laughed uncomfortably. “It is, isn’t it? But I suppose it is mine to make. I just hope I won’t end up backing out of it, you know?”

Alfred spent the rest of the party on the back porch, stargazing with Kiku. Before he left, he exchanged numbers with him, promising to text him. As Charlotte slept upon arriving back at her house, Alfred sat next to her in her bed, stalking Kiku on social media and wondering if it would be okay to add him or not.

.

Present Day

“Alfred really does have that effect on others, doesn’t he?” Arthur mused, mulling over Kiku’s story about the night they had met. “And what do you mean about your meeting not being romantic? I, for one, definitely find stargazing romantic.”

Kiku blushed. “The way my husband and I met was definitely more romantic,” he quietly told Arthur, causing the blond to smile. “But this isn’t about Heracles, it’s about Alfred.” He seemed deep in thought before saying, “Surely you’ve noticed the effect that Alfred has on others. Kind of like how his presence demands attention without him having to say a word. He just needs to walk into a room and you know he’s there. Perhaps that’s why I was drawn to him.”

Arthur thought back to when he had first met Alfred and had to admit that Kiku was right. Something about Alfred drew your attention to him whenever he was in the vicinity. It was just that he didn’t seem to notice it until it was pointed out to him. Did all of these people he would talk to feel this way about him upon sight? Though he was too young to remember his first on-sight impression of Alfred, he knew that there was no way he could disagree with what Kiku had so plainly stated.

“You’re right,” he admitted. “Alfred is definitely that kind of person, even back when he was five years old. There was something about him that drew others to him, and it made me wonder why he chose me, of all people, to be his best friend. It was as if he had latched onto me one day at recess and never let go. I’ve come to find from the people I’ve spoken with so far on this journey that he still never truly let go of me, even after we stopped speaking to each other. Do you know anything about that?”

The Japanese man smiled knowingly. “You’ll just have to find out,” he simply said.

.

Two Years Previous

“Texting Kiku?” Charlotte asked, taking her usual set next to Alfred at their lunch table. She smiled at her best friend before loving leaning her head on his shoulder, looking up at him with expectant eyes. “Aren’t you glad I dragged your sorry ass to that party?”

Alfred scoffed. “Fine, Charlie. You win. Thank you for dragging my sorry ass to the party. I’m glad I went. There, happy?”

“Music to my ears, Alfie Jones!” she sang before sitting back up and digging into her lunch. “So what are you two talking? Super top secret boy stuff that I can’t know about?” Charlotte laughed. “You know, I think he had a thing for you. I mean, who else would sit on the back porch at a party and just talk the night away to a stranger they met?”

His blush went all the way up to his ears as he attempted to shrink behind his phone. Knowing there was no way his reaction to her words would go unnoticed, he decided to give in. “Do you really think so?” he asked, smiling upon receiving a text from Kiku.

Charlotte giggled, watching him. “Think so? I know so, Alfie Jones. Call it women’s intuition or something, but I’m really good at these sorts of things. But aren’t you worried or something because he’s an adult?”

“Worried about what?” Alfred asked, blissfully ignorant to what she was referring to.

She sighed before pushing her diced pears around on her tray before answering. “Ah, nevermind. It appears my mind is getting ahead of me. Just be careful, okay? I don’t want you getting your heart broken again.” Her eyes shot up to Gilbert, who was sitting across the cafeteria from them. Their eyes met and she glared at him before he got up and left. “You’re the type of person who doesn’t deserve to be hurt by stupid boys, and I’ll make sure that you aren’t ever again.”


End file.
